the process of writing a successful college application essay

Ultimate Guide to Writing Your College Essay

Tips for writing an effective college essay.

College admissions essays are an important part of your college application and gives you the chance to show colleges and universities your character and experiences. This guide will give you tips to write an effective college essay.

Want free help with your college essay?

UPchieve connects you with knowledgeable and friendly college advisors—online, 24/7, and completely free. Get 1:1 help brainstorming topics, outlining your essay, revising a draft, or editing grammar.

Writing a strong college admissions essay

Learn about the elements of a solid admissions essay.

Avoiding common admissions essay mistakes

Learn some of the most common mistakes made on college essays

Brainstorming tips for your college essay

Stuck on what to write your college essay about? Here are some exercises to help you get started.

How formal should the tone of your college essay be?

Learn how formal your college essay should be and get tips on how to bring out your natural voice.

Taking your college essay to the next level

Hear an admissions expert discuss the appropriate level of depth necessary in your college essay.

Student Stories

Student Story: Admissions essay about a formative experience

Get the perspective of a current college student on how he approached the admissions essay.

Student Story: Admissions essay about personal identity

Get the perspective of a current college student on how she approached the admissions essay.

Student Story: Admissions essay about community impact

Student story: admissions essay about a past mistake, how to write a college application essay, tips for writing an effective application essay, sample college essay 1 with feedback, sample college essay 2 with feedback.

This content is licensed by Khan Academy and is available for free at www.khanacademy.org.

The Perfect College Application Essay: Topics, Prompts, and Tips

At Their Most Basic, College Admissions Essays Are Personal Statements That Students Write In Order To Complete Their Application And Apply To College.

Of course, that makes college essays seem easy. In reality, writing a college application essay is a complex process that every college-hopeful will have to go through. It involves personal reflection, patience, practice, and lots of outside help.

Fortunately, we’ve got everything you’ll need to prepare for writing an essay of your own.!

This article will cover how to write a college application essay, including common mistakes made on college essays, personal statement topics, tips for writing a successful admissions essay, and what the best admissions essays include. If you’re ready to take your college essays to the next level, then read on!

What You’ll Find In This Article:

• What You Need to Know About College Admissions Essays
• 6 Mistakes Students Make on College Application Essays
• Common Requirements for College Essays
• What Colleges Look for in an Admissions Essay
• 5 College Application Essay Topics and Prompts
• How to Write the Perfect College Application Essay
• Preparing for the Road Ahead

What You Need To Know About College Admissions Essays

When discussing college applications, one of the most crucial parts to understand is the essay, or personal statement.

You see, the college admissions process is not totally determined by numbers. This makes the admissions essay one of the most critical part of the application for students, because it allows them to show admissions officers who they really are.

While GPA, extracurricular activities, and academic achievements are important, the undergraduate experience is more focused on individuality and community. College admissions officers want to know how students will fit into their school culture, and the essay is typically how they judge that. Your GPA, SAT and ACT scores simply don’t paint the full picture of what you might bring to a college’s campus.

However, this is actually a huge benefit for you!

Even if your GPA or SAT scores aren’t perfect, you still have the opportunity to write an amazing college admissions essay—and often, this is the deciding factor between an average versus an outstanding college application!

6 Mistakes Students Make On College Application Essays

Some of the biggest downfalls for students writing college admissions essays are actually common mistakes that are easy to avoid—so long as you know what to look for.

Often times students fall into the trap of writing about their accomplishments and not themselves, miss the point of the prompt, or simply don’t edit what they wrote. Knowing these common mistakes can help guide you on what to do and what not to do when writing your essay.

#1: YOUR ESSAY READS LIKE A RESUME...

The point of a college application essay is to be personal, hence college essays often being called “personal statements.”

Most college essay prompts ask you not for a list of accomplishments or credentials, but for a personal essay that gives insight into who you are and what you could offer a college community.

You’ve already sent colleges your transcript, test scores, AP or IB classes, and lists of your activities. That portion of the application acted like a resume, meaning the essay is where you can focus on a unique experience or event that shaped who you are. If you miss this opportunity to talk about yourself, you’re also missing out on your best chance to stand apart from other applicants.

Which leads to another big mistake…

#2: YOU FOCUS ON OTHERS RATHER THAN YOURSELF...

Another major pitfall students face is focusing on others rather than themselves. Many students write their entire essay about an idol or family member, completely neglecting who they are.

Yes, it can feel strange or even difficult to talk about yourself in the first person, especially since you’re often taught to avoid “I” statements in school essays . However, this is a very different type of essay—the whole point is to give admissions officers insight into who you are!

Because of this, don’t be afraid to talk about yourself, your actions, and your thoughts.

The reason colleges give you the opportunity to write a personal essay is in the hope that you’ll reveal more about yourself. Make it crystal clear to the admissions officer what type of person you are so they can picture you, a unique individual, on their college campus.

#3: YOU RELY ON GIMMICKS...

Although you should be personable and relaxed in your essay, some people go too far and end up writing an ultra-casual biography.

This is another major mistake students make, often because they’re told by well-meaning teachers or mentors to imagine their essay as if they were talking to a friend or making a speech. This leads to poorly written essays that rarely even stay true to the prompt.

While your essay needs to be personal, it’s still being sent to a prestigious institution. You’re seeking higher education, not catching up with an old friend, so remain professional.

Fortunately, “professional” is exactly what it sounds like—intelligent, thoughtful, introspective, and respectful. There is no need to rely on jargon or even break out the thesaurus, but remember who will ultimately read your essay: a representative for the college you so badly want to attend.

#4: YOU NEVER EDITED YOUR ESSAY...

Unfortunately, this mistake is extremely common and extremely detrimental.

You spend so much time picking a college essay topic, writing the best admissions essay you can, and submitting your essay—but never stop to reread it.

It’s crucial that you edit your essay and search for any errors that might reflect poorly on your writing: grammatical or spelling mistakes, unclear sentences, slang, and poor formatting. Better yet, if you have the resources, enlist a parent, peer, teacher, or counselor to help edit your essay alongside you. Often you won’t catch your own mistakes, so having a second set of eyes can save your college application.

While this is one of the easiest mistakes to make, it’s also the easiest to fix. Simply take the extra time to ensure your essay is polished—don’t let a misplaced comma or a run on sentence be the reason you don’t get into your dream school!

#5: YOU IGNORED THE PROMPT...

Another dangerous mistake is not following the guidelines of your college essay prompt.

Oftentimes, students become so wrapped up in making their essay sound good that they forget to answer the questions colleges are asking. While this can be difficult, it’s critical that you pinpoint exactly what colleges are looking for in their prompts and then focus on that above all else .

For example, perhaps the prompt asked you what you learned from your biggest hardship, but you decide to talk about how being captain of the soccer team taught you leadership—this isn’t what the prompt is looking for and, unfortunately, this mistake can ruin your college application.

This is where getting the help of a college counselor , someone who has experience reading and interpreting college essay topics, can be a life-saver. A college counselor can help you identify exactly what your college essay prompts are asking for, how that relates to the topics you already want to write about, and how you can combine the two throughout your whole essay.

#6: YOUR ESSAY IS GENERIC...

The purpose of a personal statement is to show off who you are, so it’s crucial that you differentiate yourself in a meaningful way. You don’t want to end up writing about the same topic as everyone else, because that means admissions officers won’t remember you or your essay.

Here are some things to avoid:

• Don’t write about broad public issues that haven’t had a genuine impact on you. These will come across as generic and likely won’t say anything unique about who you are as a person.
• Avoid cliches whenever possible—they’re cheesy and ineffective. If you want to write about scoring the winning goal for your football team, make sure you have a unique spin that will stand out to admissions officers.

The key to making your essay memorable is to make it individual and to incorporate your identity. By showing college admissions officers a well-rounded picture of who you are, they’ll be far more likely to remember you and, best of all, want you at their school!

Common Requirements For College Essays

Length requirements:.

Whether you’re a student beginning the process of applying to college or a parent that wants to know more, some of the requirements for college essays don’t become available until the Common and UC Applications go live.

Fortunately, here are some requirements you can expect based on previous years:

• The Common Application’s personal statement, which goes to every college, is 650 words.
• The UC Application often includes two personal statements, 500 words each, or about two pages double spaced.
• Individual colleges will ask for supplemental essays in addition to the Common and UC Applications. These essays may range from several short answer essays, about 250-300 words, to an additional personal statement tailored to the particular college, about 650 words.
• There are often secondary essays required, depending on where you’re applying to college.

TOPIC REQUIREMENTS:

Although the specific topic requirements of college admissions essays change every year, there are a few topics that are recurring on the Common and UC Applications.

Prompts often focus on:

• Your background
• Your personal identity and how you developed it
• Major life lessons you’ve learned
• And any life-changing experiences you’ve had.

(You can find sample prompts for these topics later in the article!)

The prompts given by colleges for supplementary essays can vary drastically.

However, it’s common for schools to ask:

• Why you want to attend their college
• What kind of clubs you would join
• What you would contribute to their campus
• What your favorite book, movie, or hashtag is (the University of Southern California is known for these questions)

What Colleges Look For In An Admissions Essay

The key to writing a perfect college essay lies in capturing the reader’s attention.

Admission officers read dozens of college admissions essays daily, so yours needs to stand out. You should try to immediately hook the reader and explain why you’re the right fit for their college. Be specific about your own experience and write about what matters to you the most.

While there’s no one correct college essay format, there are characteristics of outstanding college essays . The best college essays show who you are as an individual, often recounting an experience that has deeply impacted you. These essays are thoughtful, developed, insightful, and introspective. Above all, the best college essays don’t have errors that distract from your main point.

A POWERFUL HOOK:

You should have a strong hook in the first few sentences of your college essay.

Your reader should be intrigued and want to know more, because you only have a limited amount of time to get their attention. However, many students find it easier to write their hook after they’ve already finished the essay and know their main point. Regardless of when you write your hook, double check that it’s impactful and strong before submitting your college essay.

Some effective ways of hooking a reader include:

• Setting the scene. Go into detail about what was happening in that moment. Make it vivid. If you’re a strong creative writer this can be especially effective.
• Opening with an anecdote . Nothing is more individual than your own experience. Personal anecdotes can help you capture the tone of your essay.
• Reveal a common misconception. You can give great insights into who you are by calling out a misconception that relates to part of your identity. It shows how you’re different from the very beginning of your essay.

A STRONG TOPIC:

To complement a strong hook, you need an equally strong topic.

This is your chance to appeal directly to an admissions officer, so the best topics should be closely related to your individual story. Choose something unique to your situation or life.

While you can certainly talk about more common experiences, they should always connect back to an insight into your own personality. For instance, there could be thousands of soccer players applying to the same college as you, but by showing how your experiences playing soccer shaped other aspects of your life, you can quickly differentiate yourself.

Above all, give your essay impact by highlighting your unique self.

VIVID (AND VISUAL) DETAILS:

Including in-depth descriptions and visual details not only helps show your story to your reader , but it’s also much more interesting and attention-grabbing.

Compare these two statements:

• I was a dancer in high school, but due to an injury I had to quit.
• Every day at 3:15 I would frantically put my hair into a bun on the car ride to ballet class. I was always fidgeting with excitement—ballet could never come soon enough. So when I was told my hips were giving out, my world changed. There were no more messy buns in the car, no more tired TV binges after I got home from practice, and no more fidgeting with excitement. I was told I would never dance again.

Which of these examples is more compelling?

If you’re being honest with yourself, the second one is. It tells a story using strong details that allow you to see the change this injury caused. While it’s harder to write, it’s far more effective, and can make or break your college essay’s success.

A PROFESSIONAL TONE:

Don’t use overly academic or technical language just to impress your college admissions officer, but make sure your writing is professional. You should write your essay the same way you would speak to a boss or teacher —it’ll be obvious if your essay is flooded with complicated words just for the sake of showing off, and it will ultimately detract from your main point.

While it’s important to write in a way that shows off your intelligence, don’t try to sound unnaturally academic. College admissions essays require you to strike a balance between casual and formal, with the goal being to show off your unique personality in a respectful, professional way. Your essay acts as an interview, so you want your reader to feel like they are talking to you and getting to know you through your essay.

CONCISE WRITING:

College application essays typically have a maximum word count of about 500-650 words and, once you start writing, this word count can quickly creep up on you. This means that your essay should be concise, yet detailed. As hard as that may sound, simply get to the point of your essay and you should find you have plenty of words to spare. Many students ramble on because they’re unsure what to say, and quickly run out of words as a result—while also boring their admissions officer.

Decide what you want to write about before you start writing, so you don’t fall into this trap. A clear, concise, and interesting essay will grab the admission officer’s attention, keep their attention, and show them your individual identity.

5 College Application Topics And Prompts

A crucial aspect of college essay writing is knowing what exactly you are going to write about.

While the specific prompts for each application don’t come out until early August, there are many recurring prompts that you can expect to see. Knowing what these college essay prompts will be about beforehand can help you get a head start for when topics finally release.

ESSAYS ABOUT IDENTITY:

Identity focused essay prompts will ask you specific questions about your interests and community, but will fundamentally be focused on what makes you who you are. These prompts are great if your identity is a big aspect of your life.

Here are some examples from the Common and UC Applications:

• Some students have a background, identity, interest, or talent that is so meaningful they believe their application would be incomplete without it. If this sounds like you, then please share your story — Common Application, 2018.
• Describe the world you come from (for example, your family, community or school) and tell us how your world has shaped your dreams and aspirations — UC Application, 2018.
• Tell us about a personal quality, talent, accomplishment, contribution or experience that is important to you. What about this quality or accomplishment makes you proud and how does it relate to the person you are? — UC Application, 2018.

ESSAYS ABOUT CHALLENGING THE STATUS QUO:

Another common essay prompt asks about individual experiences where you felt compelled to go against the norm. Usually the purpose of prompts like these are to show the reader that you’re independent, a leader, or have a strong set of individual values.

Here’s an example prompt:

• Reflect on a time when you challenged a belief or idea. What pushed you to act? Would you make the same decision again? — Common App, 2018.

These prompts call for you to discuss an experience that required some sort of strong action on your part. This would be particularly great is you’ve participated in a social cause or challenged a school policy.

ESSAYS ABOUT A MAJOR EXPERIENCE:

Prompts about formative experiences ask you to recount particularly life-changing events that defined who you grew into.

For example:

• Discuss an accomplishment or event, formal or informal, that marked your transition from childhood to adulthood within your culture, community, or family — Common App, 2018.

An essay based on this prompt would discuss a personal situation that had a major impact on your beliefs, identity, life-path, or actions.

ESSAYS ABOUT VOLUNTEER WORK:

Essays about volunteer work or community outreach don’t tend to use that specific wording, but rather use other language that relates to helping others or solving problems.

Here’s an example prompt that fits well with volunteer work:

• Describe a problem you’ve solved or a problem you’d like to solve. It can be an intellectual challenge, a research query, an ethical dilemma-anything that is of personal importance, no matter the scale. Explain its significance to you and what steps you took or could be taken to identify a solution — Common App, 2018.

This is a great way to not only highlight your values, but show how you’re already begun putting those values into practice. Of course, make sure your essay still relates back to you as a person. Whether it resonates with you because of a personal experience or connects to what you plan to study in college, volunteer work can be a great topic to focus on for your college essay.

ESSAYS ABOUT PAST MISTAKES:

Probably the hardest to write (and write well), essays about personal mistakes can also be a great chance to show humility and an aptitude for growth—both traits college admissions officers want to see.

• The lessons we take from failure can be fundamental to later success. Recount an incident or time when you experienced failure. How did it affect you, and what did you learn from the experience? — Common App, 2018.

Use these prompts as a chance to show off your maturity. While it may seem counter-intuitive to talk about a failure when trying to show off how qualified you are, remember that we all make mistakes. It’s how we handle those mistakes with grace and kindness that set us apart from others.

How To Write The Perfect College Application Essay

Now that you know what mistakes to avoid when writing your college essay and are equipped with some topics and prompts, you can begin writing your college application essay. Here’s how to write the perfect college admissions essay!

START EARLY:

One of the best things you can do for your college essay is to get a head start . If you know what prompts to expect (like the ones we discussed above) then you can work on practice essays long before the final topics are released and can begin developing ideas.

Even if you don’t have the time or energy to go that far, you should make sure to start your essay as soon as topics are officially available. You need plenty of time to think about the topics you’ll be writing about, as well as time to write multiple drafts and edit them thoroughly. This is the most important part of your college application, so give yourself as much time as possible to make sure you get into the college you want.

WRITE MULTIPLE DRAFTS:

Something as important as a college admissions essay should not be done in one shot—this essay should be something that you put a lot of time, effort, and consideration into.

This is why writing multiple drafts of your college essay is extremely important. It gives you a chance to quickly get your thoughts down, without worrying about quality, and then refine your essay from there. If you only write one draft you risk leaving out important information and failing to develop your ideas. Writing multiple drafts also gives you a chance to catch any errors that could reflect poorly on your essay.

THINK ABOUT THE QUESTION:

You need to be thoughtful in your essay.

Think carefully about the question being asked, both to ensure you answer the prompt and to show off your personality. You also want to be insightful. Your reader is trying to picture you attending their particular college, so showing your intelligent, thoughtful nature helps them see you as a thriving student in their school.

EDIT YOUR WRITING:

If you only take one thing from this article: proofread and edit!

No one writes their best work on their first try. If you leave time to reread and edit your essay you’ll think about your topic and gain new insights in the process. Most importantly, editing can transform your essay from something average to something impressive and memorable.

Of course, many students aren’t equipped to edit their own writing—especially alongside all of the other important tasks that go into submitting a college essay. It’s hard to be objective about your own work, especially if you’re feeling rushed, so make sure to seek outside help if you feel you need it.

No matter how good your essay may be, it can’t truly shine unless your writing is polished as well.

Just like we said above, you really need a second set of eyes on your essay.

When you read your own work, you often skip over mistakes because you know what you intended to write—even if that’s not what ended up on the page. You’ll miss major grammatical errors and will leave behind sentences or even whole paragraphs that simply don’t make sense to anyone but yourself. In an essay that’s only 600 words, that’s a huge amount of lost real estate.

Fortunately, there are many people out there who want to help you write the best possible college admissions essay possible:

• College-aged Siblings
• College Counselors

Of everyone on this list, college counselors are by far the best resource out there. However, keep in mind that counselors are usually swamped with requests for help come application time.

In these instances, bringing in an outside counselor can often be your best bet.

These professionals can go in-depth with you on a one-on-one basis, helping you not only polish your essay, but refine your entire application strategy. In fact, many students prefer to seek outside counselors for this very reason—a school counselor rarely has the time to work on both your application and essay together.

If you’re hoping to get into any of the top colleges in the US, you’ll want to strongly consider hiring a professional counselor to help.

Preparing For The Road Ahead

Applying to colleges is an intimidating process, but we hope these tips have helped you feel that much more prepared for the journey ahead.

Of course, this article isn’t all we have to offer.

Whether you’re a student dreaming of Yale, Standford, or Harvard, or a parent looking to support your kid however you can, we’re here to help. WeAdmit is a team of college counseling professionals who intimately understand the admissions process. Whether you’re struggling to write the perfect essay or aren’t even sure where to apply yet, we can work with you one-on-one to refine your application strategy and support you through the many twists and turns of applying to college.

Are You Ready? Let’s Get Into College!

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How to Write a Good College Application Essay

By Janet Morrissey

• Aug. 2, 2018

Here are some tips compiled from experts for writing that all-important application essay, which can often mean the difference between getting accepted — or rejected — by the school of your choice.

The essay is your megaphone — your view of the world and your ambitions. It’s not just a resume or a regurgitation of everything you’ve done. It needs to tell a story with passion, using personal, entertaining anecdotes that showcase your character, your interests, your values, your life experiences, your views of the world, your ambitions and even your sense of humor.

Emphasize volunteer work or other ways you’ve helped people or made your community a better place. It helps if the activity is related to the subject you want to study. For example, Christopher Rim of Command Education Group, which coaches students, remembers that one student who wanted to become a dentist set up a nonprofit and held fund-raisers to distribute toothbrushes, toothpaste and other dental products to homeless shelters. Admissions staff members want to know how your presence will make the college a better place.

Mention internships, summer courses, extracurricular activities or lab work that show steps you’ve taken to learn and understand your field of interest. That will help show you know the field you’ve chosen to study and are passionate about it.

Explain with knowledge and passion why you want to study at this particular college rather than at others. Tell why the school’s size, curriculum, social atmosphere, location, professors or history influenced your choice.

Correct spelling, grammar and punctuation are critical. Use grammar, syntax and writing with a level of sophistication that shows you’re ready for college. Never use text-style abbreviations or rude or profane language.

After the essay is submitted, check your email and voice mail daily to make sure you see and respond promptly to messages from admissions staff members. Many students check only texts and sometimes miss emails asking follow-up questions or requesting an interview.

Hafeez Lakhani of Lakhani Coaching summed up the essay this way: “Every college is like a dinner table. What will make you the most interesting contributor to that dinner table conversation? What will make you help everyone else have a more interesting experience?” A good essay, rich with anecdotes and personality, will answer those questions and stand out from the pile.

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College admissions

Course: college admissions   >   unit 4.

• Writing a strong college admissions essay
• Avoiding common admissions essay mistakes
• Brainstorming tips for your college essay
• How formal should the tone of your college essay be?
• Taking your college essay to the next level
• Sample essay 1 with admissions feedback
• Sample essay 2 with admissions feedback
• Student story: Admissions essay about a formative experience
• Student story: Admissions essay about personal identity
• Student story: Admissions essay about community impact
• Student story: Admissions essay about a past mistake
• Student story: Admissions essay about a meaningful poem

Writing tips and techniques for your college essay

Pose a question the reader wants answered, don't focus exclusively on the past, experiment with the unexpected, don't summarize, want to join the conversation.

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What are your chances of acceptance?

Calculate for all schools, your chance of acceptance.

Your chancing factors

Extracurriculars.

A Guide to College Application Essay Timelines

This article was written based on the information and opinions presented by Robert Crystal and Christopher Kilner in a CollegeVine livestream. You can watch the full livestream for more info.

What’s Covered

Make a plan.

• September and October

November and December

Anyone can write an excellent essay if they have enough time, and it’s important to prioritize writing a strong essay because it plays such an outsized role in the application process. With sufficient time and preparation, you can also decrease your word count and produce a piece of writing that is brief and high quality. “If I had more time, I would have written a shorter letter,” is a phrase often attributed to many famous scholars and statespeople. The best thing that you can do to set yourself up for success is to plan ahead, giving yourself plenty of time to engage in the writing process and produce multiple drafts of your essay.

It is most helpful to use the summer before your senior year of high school—or the year during which you are applying—to prepare your college application essays, with the goal of completing at least your personal statement by early September. The following timeline roughly outlines the steps of the writing process that you should take each month to achieve this goal.

For more guidance on writing your personal statement, read our article on how to write the Common Application essays for 2022-2023 .

Review the Common Application essay prompts for the most recent application season. These prompts often remain the same as the previous year. Pick a few essay prompts that resonate with you, and start to contemplate them as you go through your day. Maybe you can use your daily bus ride or afternoon stroll to brainstorm possible topics for the prompts that interest you. It is always helpful to have a journal, a note-taking app on your phone, or scratch paper on hand where you can record your ideas. 

In addition to journaling about potential material for your essays, it’s helpful to practice thinking about and articulating your responses to various questions about who you are and how you think and view the world. Here are a few examples:

• What are your core values? How did you develop this system of values? 
• What motivates you? How do you motivate yourself? 
• What are you passionate about? If you could study anything, what would you want to learn more about? 
• What issues in your local community or at the city, state, national, or global level are most concerning to you?
• What are your short-term goals and long-term dreams and aspirations? Where would you like to see yourself in five or 10 years? What are lifetime goals that you have?

For more brainstorming questions, read “ 7 Questions to Help You Start Writing Your College Essays .”

Your goal for May is to outline and write a complete rough draft of your personal statement. The hardest part of writing your essay is committing something to paper, and the best draft is often a bad first draft. Everything becomes easier once you have words to edit. Your first draft does not need to be amazing or even passable; it can be completely awful, and it will still be better than a blank page.

Use June to edit the rough draft that you produced in May. This is where you will dive into the process of constructing your narrative. Then, you should aim to produce at least three or more additional drafts. These will likely be the most time-intensive drafts that you produce.

At this point in the process, you should work on developing your ideas mostly on your own. You do not need to share your essay with anyone else unless you feel confident that your draft is ready for others to review or that you cannot progress without outside input. 

You should continue producing new drafts of your personal statement. This means you should read aloud your essay from beginning to end and make changes to word choice, grammar, sentence structure, paragraph structure, and content. You should do this every three or so days. 

Now is a great time to share your drafts with a close family member, friend, teacher, or high school counselor. In addition to showing your essays to members of your inner circle, you should prioritize finding a neutral third party to review your essays and provide critical feedback. This third party should be someone familiar with the college admissions process, such as a current college student, a recent college graduate, or a college consultant, like a CollegeVine Advisor . 

Ask each person who reads your essay to provide written feedback, or have a conversation with them about their impressions, suggestions, and questions. Of course, too many cooks can spoil the broth, as the saying goes. Show your essay to enough people to get a broad range of opinions but not so many that you feel overwhelmed or confused.

This month should be devoted to incorporating feedback from people who have read your essay and doing the final polishing work that will take your essay to the next level. By the end of August, you should have a final draft of your personal statement that you would feel confident submitting.

September and October 

Work on and complete your supplemental essays in preparation for meeting the early action and early decision deadlines.

Work on and complete your supplemental essays in preparation for meeting the regular decision deadline.

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The resources in this section provide a general timeline for undergraduate applications. In this section you will also find more detailed information about each stage in the application process, as well as a handout on writing the admissions application essay.

Advice for Writing Successful Application Essays

When you sit down to write your application essays, there is very little left that you can control. You should have already taken, or retaken, the SAT and ACT, your grades from your first three years of high school are set on your transcript, and your recommenders all have their impressions of you that are unlikely to change before the recommendation deadline. The only thing that left in your control is your writing for the application essay.

As with all things related to your college application, you will need to start drafting your application essay far ahead of the due date. In fact, you should move each school’s deadline up two weeks so that no unexpected events prevent you from completing and submitting your application. The reason that you need so much time to work on your essay is primarily because many schools will ask you to write about similar topics, but to do so in different ways. You will need enough time to draft essays that address each of these questions or prompts for each school to which you are applying.

Don't use boilerplate essays. That is, resist the urge to reuse the exact same essay for different schools if each of them is giving you a slightly different writing prompt. You can, of course, adapt the same essay for similar prompts. Many schools do allow you to use the Common Application essay for admission to several participating schools. For more information on the Common Application and to check which schools participate as members, click here .

Although using the Common Application does simplify the processes, make sure that you review each of the schools’ application requirements. as many of these same schools also request that you submit a second essay along with the Common Application essay. For instance, in addition to answering one of the standard Common Application questions, Amherst College asks that you write an additional essay responding to one of several quotations.

Before you can start writing your essay, you will need to begin by reading the prompts and questions carefully. Even the Common Application has six prompts that you can choose from. Don’t feel as though you must choose one immediately after reading them. You should ask yourself what sticks out the most for you after having read through them. Think about what is most salient for you.

Brainstorm by putting your thoughts on paper. You can free write (writing without stopping or censoring yourself), create word association maps (visually clustering concepts that you feel go together), or keep a journal over the course of several days so that you can collect your thoughts in one place. See the Purdue OWL's PowerPoint on “ Finding your Focus ” for more details on these strategies.

After you have generated several ideas, reflect on where you find the most intensity or excitement in what you were writing. If nothing jumps out at you, keep brainstorming or talk with others about some possible topics until something grabs you.

Once you know what want to write about, put a rough draft on paper. Don’t be afraid of stray thoughts if they lead you to something more interesting than you had set out to write. Just make sure that you eventually come to have a rough draft that is about one thing.

Look over your draft and check for the following.

• Your writing should be personal. After reading your essay, does it seem like anyone could have written this? Make sure that your essay captures who you are.
• You writing should show, not tell, through vivid language. Successful essays relate an experience or analyze a pattern from the writer’s life. It is not enough to make general claims about what impacted your decision to go to college, for instance; you must elaborate by including evidence that answers “how” and “why” when you make your claims.

It is important to note that admissions officers care as much about your structure, style, and insights as they do about your content. That is not meant to add an extra layer of anxiety to your writing process, but to highlight the fact that you don’t necessarily need to have something life-changing to write about in order to write a successful essay. As Dowhan, Dowhan and Kaufman note in Essays that Will Get You into College , “Personal does not have to mean heavy, emotional or even inspiring” (10). In fact, as the authors explain, students might over rely on the significant event that they write about to speak for itself and don’t “explain what it meant to them or give a solid example of how it changed them. In other words, they do not make it personal” (10).

Finally, your writing should be about a sustained topic. You must use vivid description with a purpose. What is it that you learned because of this experience? What message can you decipher from the series of events that you present? What led you to your conclusions?

Once you have completed your rough draft, put it away for a few days. Afterwards, read the question again and look through your essay. Ask yourself if the essay answers the prompt. Is it personal? Does it use vivid language? Is it focused on one topic? Rewrite whatever needs to be strengthened. This is a great time to have other people look through your draft and get their reaction. Make sure that you ask someone early, and that you trust this person’s judgment; they will be putting in a lot of time to help you, so don’t disregard anything that is inconvenient or that you don’t want to hear.

Again, giving yourself plenty of time to work on this essay is vital. You should have enough time to rewrite or restructure your essay based on the feedback that you have received. As you are drafting and revising, feel free to fix any mistakes that you catch in terms of spelling, grammar, and mechanics, but don’t spend too much time editing early on in the writing process. Working on lower-order concerns can give you the impression that the essay is ready to submit prematurely. Instead, use this time to strengthen the main points of your essay.

To supplement the advice offered on this page, you can find a handout on writing the admissions application essay here .

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Fifteen Steps for a Successful College Admissions Essay

Up Next: Check out 2022’s 10 Successful Harvard Application Essays

So you want to write a college admissions essay.

By now you have undoubtedly received a wide range of advice from a wide range of sources: guidance counselors urging you to start early, parents worried about your vocabulary level, English teachers stressing the importance of proper grammar.

At this point you have also probably come to the realization that there is no one foolproof method for writing a winning admissions essay. In fact, much of the advice you have probably been given—and which you will read in this article—will probably contradict itself. Example: "Take a risk. Write about something that will make your essay stand out," versus "Don't take any chances. The admissions committee is looking for a well-written, well-argued essay. You can do that without coloring outside the lines." Another example: "The personal statement is only one part of your application. Don't stress," versus "Revise. Revise. Revise. Proofread. Proofread. Proofread. Draft multiple versions. This is the most important piece of writing you will ever produce."

As you can already see, the whole process can be very confusing. Don't let this discourage you. The most truthful advice that can be offered is that there is no one way to write a successful admissions essay. The essay—in terms of both its content and the manner in which it is written—is like you: unique. The beauty of the personal statement is that it is completely personal.

Still, we have pledged to help you, and help you we will, by way of the following steps to writing a good, solid, impressive admissions essay. Many of these tips resemble advice your high school English teacher would offer. Others are advice that you may have heard from sisters, brothers, and friends.

Here it goes:

1. Think strategically.

Your essay is an opportunity to show a part of yourself that neither your test scores nor your grades can convey. There are many ways to go about doing this. You can emphasize your creative talent, or you can play up an extracurricular activity or hobby that is particularly important to you. You can discuss a formative moment or an aspect of your life that you feel has shaped you. If you devote the essay to rehashing what is already apparent in the rest of the application, you lose a valuable space for self-expression.

2. Be reflective

Speak from the heart. Explain what the experience means to you, rather than simply recounting the experience as it happened. This is what gives your application a human component and differentiates you from everyone else. It's important to show how you have changed and developed into the person you are today.

3. Start early.

Give yourself enough time to brainstorm and then let drafts sit so you have more time to proofread. The more time you have, the more you can make the essay truly reflect who you are.

4. Brainstorm ideas with friends, family members, and teachers.

While the personal statement is one of the most intimate parts of the application, it certainly can benefit from constructive criticism. Don't rule out any essay topic because it's not impressive enough, exciting enough, or unique enough. You may not realize just how important it was for you to hit the game's winning shot, or how much your support helped a family member get through a life-threatening illness. Those who know you best can give you very effective feedback.

5. Avoid clichés in your writing and be original in your ideas.

This rule applies for images within your writing as well as for the topic of the essay itself. Be aware that some ideas–winning the state football/soccer/gymnastics championship–have been done at least a thousand times before you. There's nothing inherently wrong with addressing the thrill of victory and the agony of defeat, but try to be more original. Be memorable.

6. Steer away from gimmicks.

People have pulled them off, but to do it, you have to do it well. If you're a great cartoonist, send in those comic strips. Or if you are a wonderful poet, go for it. Don't attempt to invent something just to make your essay stand out. Be subtle and tactful, using an authentic voice and wit. Remember, execution is everything and mediocrity doesn't win.

7. If you don't know what a word means, don't use it.

Remember the "K.I.S.S." rule: keep it simple, stupid. Make two or three points and finish up. Don't overwhelm your reader with extraneous details. Even if you do know what a long word means, a short word might just as well express what you're trying to say. The SATs are your chance to flex those verbal muscles, and there is nothing worse than misusing a word in an essay.

8. Stay "on message."

Admissions officers will read your essay in less than a few minutes, so keep the scale of the story manageable. Use relevant and specific anecdotes to prove your point. Every word should say something new. Read through the essay several times and trim repetitive or nonfunctional sentences. Don't expect to express all the nuances and complexities of what the death of a loved one meant in less than five hundred words. Keep the scope of your essay appropriate to the length.

9. Start strong.

As any good essayist will tell you, it's the beginning that counts most. Remember that your reader is trying to glean a sense of who you are, so try and grab the reader's attention from the beginning. Make it easy for them, make them want to read on, and you will be rewarded.

10. Conclusions are important.

Many times, a beautifully written essay is weakened with a moral at the end of the story. Don't ruin a perfectly good essay by launching into broad, sweeping generalizations. If you find yourself thinking that a platitude is necessary to prove your point, start revising. Returning to your opening line in your ending sentence is a good way to tie it all together. Just as the introduction will set the tone for the essay, the conclusion must resonate with the reader.

11. Don't take yourself too seriously.

Don't be afraid to be yourself. Use humor if you are a funny person. As long as it's tasteful, it can't hurt you to make your reader smile.

13. Proofread.

14. proofread., 15. proofread..

Want more assistance? Read your peers’ successful Harvard essays in our 2022 iteration of the 10 Successful Harvard Application Essays listicle, and hear from expert college consultants about what made them work.

By the Harvard Crimson’s Brand Studio

This article was written by a current junior in the Harvard Class of 2023 and a member of the Crimson Brand Studio, reflecting on their personal experiences in the college application process.

On behalf of The Harvard Crimson , the nation's oldest continually published college newspaper, The Crimson Brand Studio produces, publishes, and promotes stories that engage millions of readers who are interested in or affiliated with Harvard University.

The Crimson's news and opinion teams, including writers, editors, photographers, or designers, are not involved in the production of content for The Crimson Brand Studio.

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College Admissions , College Essays

The personal statement might just be the hardest part of your college application. Mostly this is because it has the least guidance and is the most open-ended. One way to understand what colleges are looking for when they ask you to write an essay is to check out the essays of students who already got in—college essays that actually worked. After all, they must be among the most successful of this weird literary genre.

In this article, I'll go through general guidelines for what makes great college essays great. I've also compiled an enormous list of 100+ actual sample college essays from 11 different schools. Finally, I'll break down two of these published college essay examples and explain why and how they work. With links to 177 full essays and essay excerpts , this article is a great resource for learning how to craft your own personal college admissions essay!

What Excellent College Essays Have in Common

Even though in many ways these sample college essays are very different from one other, they do share some traits you should try to emulate as you write your own essay.

Visible Signs of Planning

Building out from a narrow, concrete focus. You'll see a similar structure in many of the essays. The author starts with a very detailed story of an event or description of a person or place. After this sense-heavy imagery, the essay expands out to make a broader point about the author, and connects this very memorable experience to the author's present situation, state of mind, newfound understanding, or maturity level.

Knowing how to tell a story. Some of the experiences in these essays are one-of-a-kind. But most deal with the stuff of everyday life. What sets them apart is the way the author approaches the topic: analyzing it for drama and humor, for its moving qualities, for what it says about the author's world, and for how it connects to the author's emotional life.

Stellar Execution

A killer first sentence. You've heard it before, and you'll hear it again: you have to suck the reader in, and the best place to do that is the first sentence. Great first sentences are punchy. They are like cliffhangers, setting up an exciting scene or an unusual situation with an unclear conclusion, in order to make the reader want to know more. Don't take my word for it—check out these 22 first sentences from Stanford applicants and tell me you don't want to read the rest of those essays to find out what happens!

A lively, individual voice. Writing is for readers. In this case, your reader is an admissions officer who has read thousands of essays before yours and will read thousands after. Your goal? Don't bore your reader. Use interesting descriptions, stay away from clichés, include your own offbeat observations—anything that makes this essay sounds like you and not like anyone else.

Technical correctness. No spelling mistakes, no grammar weirdness, no syntax issues, no punctuation snafus—each of these sample college essays has been formatted and proofread perfectly. If this kind of exactness is not your strong suit, you're in luck! All colleges advise applicants to have their essays looked over several times by parents, teachers, mentors, and anyone else who can spot a comma splice. Your essay must be your own work, but there is absolutely nothing wrong with getting help polishing it.

And if you need more guidance, connect with PrepScholar's expert admissions consultants . These expert writers know exactly what college admissions committees look for in an admissions essay and chan help you craft an essay that boosts your chances of getting into your dream school.

Check out PrepScholar's Essay Editing and Coaching progra m for more details!

Links to Full College Essay Examples

Some colleges publish a selection of their favorite accepted college essays that worked, and I've put together a selection of over 100 of these.

Common App Essay Samples

Please note that some of these college essay examples may be responding to prompts that are no longer in use. The current Common App prompts are as follows:

1. Some students have a background, identity, interest, or talent that is so meaningful they believe their application would be incomplete without it. If this sounds like you, then please share your story. 2. The lessons we take from obstacles we encounter can be fundamental to later success. Recount a time when you faced a challenge, setback, or failure. How did it affect you, and what did you learn from the experience? 3. Reflect on a time when you questioned or challenged a belief or idea. What prompted your thinking? What was the outcome? 4. Reflect on something that someone has done for you that has made you happy or thankful in a surprising way. How has this gratitude affected or motivated you? 5. Discuss an accomplishment, event, or realization that sparked a period of personal growth and a new understanding of yourself or others. 6. Describe a topic, idea, or concept you find so engaging that it makes you lose all track of time. Why does it captivate you? What or who do you turn to when you want to learn more?

7. Share an essay on any topic of your choice. It can be one you've already written, one that responds to a different prompt, or one of your own design.

Now, let's get to the good stuff: the list of 177 college essay examples responding to current and past Common App essay prompts. 

Connecticut college.

• 12 Common Application essays from the classes of 2022-2025

Hamilton College

• 7 Common Application essays from the class of 2026
• 7 Common Application essays from the class of 2022
• 7 Common Application essays from the class of 2018
• 8 Common Application essays from the class of 2012
• 8 Common Application essays from the class of 2007

Johns Hopkins

These essays are answers to past prompts from either the Common Application or the Coalition Application (which Johns Hopkins used to accept).

• 1 Common Application or Coalition Application essay from the class of 2026
• 6 Common Application or Coalition Application essays from the class of 2025
• 6 Common Application or Universal Application essays from the class of 2024
• 6 Common Application or Universal Application essays from the class of 2023
• 7 Common Application of Universal Application essays from the class of 2022
• 5 Common Application or Universal Application essays from the class of 2021
• 7 Common Application or Universal Application essays from the class of 2020

Essay Examples Published by Other Websites

• 2 Common Application essays ( 1st essay , 2nd essay ) from applicants admitted to Columbia

Other Sample College Essays

Here is a collection of essays that are college-specific.

Babson College

• 4 essays (and 1 video response) on "Why Babson" from the class of 2020

Emory University

• 5 essay examples ( 1 , 2 , 3 , 4 , 5 ) from the class of 2020 along with analysis from Emory admissions staff on why the essays were exceptional
• 5 more recent essay examples ( 1 , 2 , 3 , 4 , 5 ) along with analysis from Emory admissions staff on what made these essays stand out

University of Georgia

• 1 “strong essay” sample from 2019
• 1 “strong essay” sample from 2018
• 10 Harvard essays from 2023
• 10 Harvard essays from 2022
• 10 Harvard essays from 2021
• 10 Harvard essays from 2020
• 10 Harvard essays from 2019
• 10 Harvard essays from 2018
• 6 essays from admitted MIT students

Smith College

• 6 "best gift" essays from the class of 2018

Books of College Essays

If you're looking for even more sample college essays, consider purchasing a college essay book. The best of these include dozens of essays that worked and feedback from real admissions officers.

College Essays That Made a Difference —This detailed guide from Princeton Review includes not only successful essays, but also interviews with admissions officers and full student profiles.

50 Successful Harvard Application Essays by the Staff of the Harvard Crimson—A must for anyone aspiring to Harvard .

50 Successful Ivy League Application Essays and 50 Successful Stanford Application Essays by Gen and Kelly Tanabe—For essays from other top schools, check out this venerated series, which is regularly updated with new essays.

Heavenly Essays by Janine W. Robinson—This collection from the popular blogger behind Essay Hell includes a wider range of schools, as well as helpful tips on honing your own essay.

Analyzing Great Common App Essays That Worked

I've picked two essays from the examples collected above to examine in more depth so that you can see exactly what makes a successful college essay work. Full credit for these essays goes to the original authors and the schools that published them.

Example 1: "Breaking Into Cars," by Stephen, Johns Hopkins Class of '19 (Common App Essay, 636 words long)

I had never broken into a car before.

We were in Laredo, having just finished our first day at a Habitat for Humanity work site. The Hotchkiss volunteers had already left, off to enjoy some Texas BBQ, leaving me behind with the college kids to clean up. Not until we were stranded did we realize we were locked out of the van.

Someone picked a coat hanger out of the dumpster, handed it to me, and took a few steps back.

"Can you do that thing with a coat hanger to unlock it?"

"Why me?" I thought.

More out of amusement than optimism, I gave it a try. I slid the hanger into the window's seal like I'd seen on crime shows, and spent a few minutes jiggling the apparatus around the inside of the frame. Suddenly, two things simultaneously clicked. One was the lock on the door. (I actually succeeded in springing it.) The other was the realization that I'd been in this type of situation before. In fact, I'd been born into this type of situation.

My upbringing has numbed me to unpredictability and chaos. With a family of seven, my home was loud, messy, and spottily supervised. My siblings arguing, the dog barking, the phone ringing—all meant my house was functioning normally. My Dad, a retired Navy pilot, was away half the time. When he was home, he had a parenting style something like a drill sergeant. At the age of nine, I learned how to clear burning oil from the surface of water. My Dad considered this a critical life skill—you know, in case my aircraft carrier should ever get torpedoed. "The water's on fire! Clear a hole!" he shouted, tossing me in the lake without warning. While I'm still unconvinced about that particular lesson's practicality, my Dad's overarching message is unequivocally true: much of life is unexpected, and you have to deal with the twists and turns.

Living in my family, days rarely unfolded as planned. A bit overlooked, a little pushed around, I learned to roll with reality, negotiate a quick deal, and give the improbable a try. I don't sweat the small stuff, and I definitely don't expect perfect fairness. So what if our dining room table only has six chairs for seven people? Someone learns the importance of punctuality every night.

But more than punctuality and a special affinity for musical chairs, my family life has taught me to thrive in situations over which I have no power. Growing up, I never controlled my older siblings, but I learned how to thwart their attempts to control me. I forged alliances, and realigned them as necessary. Sometimes, I was the poor, defenseless little brother; sometimes I was the omniscient elder. Different things to different people, as the situation demanded. I learned to adapt.

Back then, these techniques were merely reactions undertaken to ensure my survival. But one day this fall, Dr. Hicks, our Head of School, asked me a question that he hoped all seniors would reflect on throughout the year: "How can I participate in a thing I do not govern, in the company of people I did not choose?"

The question caught me off guard, much like the question posed to me in Laredo. Then, I realized I knew the answer. I knew why the coat hanger had been handed to me.

Growing up as the middle child in my family, I was a vital participant in a thing I did not govern, in the company of people I did not choose. It's family. It's society. And often, it's chaos. You participate by letting go of the small stuff, not expecting order and perfection, and facing the unexpected with confidence, optimism, and preparedness. My family experience taught me to face a serendipitous world with confidence.

What Makes This Essay Tick?

It's very helpful to take writing apart in order to see just how it accomplishes its objectives. Stephen's essay is very effective. Let's find out why!

An Opening Line That Draws You In

In just eight words, we get: scene-setting (he is standing next to a car about to break in), the idea of crossing a boundary (he is maybe about to do an illegal thing for the first time), and a cliffhanger (we are thinking: is he going to get caught? Is he headed for a life of crime? Is he about to be scared straight?).

Great, Detailed Opening Story

More out of amusement than optimism, I gave it a try. I slid the hanger into the window's seal like I'd seen on crime shows, and spent a few minutes jiggling the apparatus around the inside of the frame.

It's the details that really make this small experience come alive. Notice how whenever he can, Stephen uses a more specific, descriptive word in place of a more generic one. The volunteers aren't going to get food or dinner; they're going for "Texas BBQ." The coat hanger comes from "a dumpster." Stephen doesn't just move the coat hanger—he "jiggles" it.

Details also help us visualize the emotions of the people in the scene. The person who hands Stephen the coat hanger isn't just uncomfortable or nervous; he "takes a few steps back"—a description of movement that conveys feelings. Finally, the detail of actual speech makes the scene pop. Instead of writing that the other guy asked him to unlock the van, Stephen has the guy actually say his own words in a way that sounds like a teenager talking.

Turning a Specific Incident Into a Deeper Insight

Suddenly, two things simultaneously clicked. One was the lock on the door. (I actually succeeded in springing it.) The other was the realization that I'd been in this type of situation before. In fact, I'd been born into this type of situation.

Stephen makes the locked car experience a meaningful illustration of how he has learned to be resourceful and ready for anything, and he also makes this turn from the specific to the broad through an elegant play on the two meanings of the word "click."

Using Concrete Examples When Making Abstract Claims

My upbringing has numbed me to unpredictability and chaos. With a family of seven, my home was loud, messy, and spottily supervised. My siblings arguing, the dog barking, the phone ringing—all meant my house was functioning normally.

"Unpredictability and chaos" are very abstract, not easily visualized concepts. They could also mean any number of things—violence, abandonment, poverty, mental instability. By instantly following up with highly finite and unambiguous illustrations like "family of seven" and "siblings arguing, the dog barking, the phone ringing," Stephen grounds the abstraction in something that is easy to picture: a large, noisy family.

Using Small Bits of Humor and Casual Word Choice

My Dad, a retired Navy pilot, was away half the time. When he was home, he had a parenting style something like a drill sergeant. At the age of nine, I learned how to clear burning oil from the surface of water. My Dad considered this a critical life skill—you know, in case my aircraft carrier should ever get torpedoed.

Obviously, knowing how to clean burning oil is not high on the list of things every 9-year-old needs to know. To emphasize this, Stephen uses sarcasm by bringing up a situation that is clearly over-the-top: "in case my aircraft carrier should ever get torpedoed."

The humor also feels relaxed. Part of this is because he introduces it with the colloquial phrase "you know," so it sounds like he is talking to us in person. This approach also diffuses the potential discomfort of the reader with his father's strictness—since he is making jokes about it, clearly he is OK. Notice, though, that this doesn't occur very much in the essay. This helps keep the tone meaningful and serious rather than flippant.

An Ending That Stretches the Insight Into the Future

But one day this fall, Dr. Hicks, our Head of School, asked me a question that he hoped all seniors would reflect on throughout the year: "How can I participate in a thing I do not govern, in the company of people I did not choose?"

The ending of the essay reveals that Stephen's life has been one long preparation for the future. He has emerged from chaos and his dad's approach to parenting as a person who can thrive in a world that he can't control.

This connection of past experience to current maturity and self-knowledge is a key element in all successful personal essays. Colleges are very much looking for mature, self-aware applicants. These are the qualities of successful college students, who will be able to navigate the independence college classes require and the responsibility and quasi-adulthood of college life.

What Could This Essay Do Even Better?

Even the best essays aren't perfect, and even the world's greatest writers will tell you that writing is never "finished"—just "due." So what would we tweak in this essay if we could?

Replace some of the clichéd language. Stephen uses handy phrases like "twists and turns" and "don't sweat the small stuff" as a kind of shorthand for explaining his relationship to chaos and unpredictability. But using too many of these ready-made expressions runs the risk of clouding out your own voice and replacing it with something expected and boring.

Use another example from recent life. Stephen's first example (breaking into the van in Laredo) is a great illustration of being resourceful in an unexpected situation. But his essay also emphasizes that he "learned to adapt" by being "different things to different people." It would be great to see how this plays out outside his family, either in the situation in Laredo or another context.

Example 2: By Renner Kwittken, Tufts Class of '23 (Common App Essay, 645 words long)

My first dream job was to be a pickle truck driver. I saw it in my favorite book, Richard Scarry's "Cars and Trucks and Things That Go," and for some reason, I was absolutely obsessed with the idea of driving a giant pickle. Much to the discontent of my younger sister, I insisted that my parents read us that book as many nights as possible so we could find goldbug, a small little golden bug, on every page. I would imagine the wonderful life I would have: being a pig driving a giant pickle truck across the country, chasing and finding goldbug. I then moved on to wanting to be a Lego Master. Then an architect. Then a surgeon.

Then I discovered a real goldbug: gold nanoparticles that can reprogram macrophages to assist in killing tumors, produce clear images of them without sacrificing the subject, and heat them to obliteration.

Suddenly the destination of my pickle was clear.

I quickly became enveloped by the world of nanomedicine; I scoured articles about liposomes, polymeric micelles, dendrimers, targeting ligands, and self-assembling nanoparticles, all conquering cancer in some exotic way. Completely absorbed, I set out to find a mentor to dive even deeper into these topics. After several rejections, I was immensely grateful to receive an invitation to work alongside Dr. Sangeeta Ray at Johns Hopkins.

In the lab, Dr. Ray encouraged a great amount of autonomy to design and implement my own procedures. I chose to attack a problem that affects the entire field of nanomedicine: nanoparticles consistently fail to translate from animal studies into clinical trials. Jumping off recent literature, I set out to see if a pre-dose of a common chemotherapeutic could enhance nanoparticle delivery in aggressive prostate cancer, creating three novel constructs based on three different linear polymers, each using fluorescent dye (although no gold, sorry goldbug!). Though using radioactive isotopes like Gallium and Yttrium would have been incredible, as a 17-year-old, I unfortunately wasn't allowed in the same room as these radioactive materials (even though I took a Geiger counter to a pair of shoes and found them to be slightly dangerous).

I hadn't expected my hypothesis to work, as the research project would have ideally been led across two full years. Yet while there are still many optimizations and revisions to be done, I was thrilled to find -- with completely new nanoparticles that may one day mean future trials will use particles with the initials "RK-1" -- thatcyclophosphamide did indeed increase nanoparticle delivery to the tumor in a statistically significant way.

A secondary, unexpected research project was living alone in Baltimore, a new city to me, surrounded by people much older than I. Even with moving frequently between hotels, AirBnB's, and students' apartments, I strangely reveled in the freedom I had to enjoy my surroundings and form new friendships with graduate school students from the lab. We explored The Inner Harbor at night, attended a concert together one weekend, and even got to watch the Orioles lose (to nobody's surprise). Ironically, it's through these new friendships I discovered something unexpected: what I truly love is sharing research. Whether in a presentation or in a casual conversation, making others interested in science is perhaps more exciting to me than the research itself. This solidified a new pursuit to angle my love for writing towards illuminating science in ways people can understand, adding value to a society that can certainly benefit from more scientific literacy.

It seems fitting that my goals are still transforming: in Scarry's book, there is not just one goldbug, there is one on every page. With each new experience, I'm learning that it isn't the goldbug itself, but rather the act of searching for the goldbugs that will encourage, shape, and refine my ever-evolving passions. Regardless of the goldbug I seek -- I know my pickle truck has just begun its journey.

Renner takes a somewhat different approach than Stephen, but their essay is just as detailed and engaging. Let's go through some of the strengths of this essay.

One Clear Governing Metaphor

This essay is ultimately about two things: Renner’s dreams and future career goals, and Renner’s philosophy on goal-setting and achieving one’s dreams.

But instead of listing off all the amazing things they’ve done to pursue their dream of working in nanomedicine, Renner tells a powerful, unique story instead. To set up the narrative, Renner opens the essay by connecting their experiences with goal-setting and dream-chasing all the way back to a memorable childhood experience:

This lighthearted–but relevant!--story about the moment when Renner first developed a passion for a specific career (“finding the goldbug”) provides an anchor point for the rest of the essay. As Renner pivots to describing their current dreams and goals–working in nanomedicine–the metaphor of “finding the goldbug” is reflected in Renner’s experiments, rejections, and new discoveries.

Though Renner tells multiple stories about their quest to “find the goldbug,” or, in other words, pursue their passion, each story is connected by a unifying theme; namely, that as we search and grow over time, our goals will transform…and that’s okay! By the end of the essay, Renner uses the metaphor of “finding the goldbug” to reiterate the relevance of the opening story:

While the earlier parts of the essay convey Renner’s core message by showing, the final, concluding paragraph sums up Renner’s insights by telling. By briefly and clearly stating the relevance of the goldbug metaphor to their own philosophy on goals and dreams, Renner demonstrates their creativity, insight, and eagerness to grow and evolve as the journey continues into college.

An Engaging, Individual Voice

This essay uses many techniques that make Renner sound genuine and make the reader feel like we already know them.

Technique #1: humor. Notice Renner's gentle and relaxed humor that lightly mocks their younger self's grand ambitions (this is different from the more sarcastic kind of humor used by Stephen in the first essay—you could never mistake one writer for the other).

My first dream job was to be a pickle truck driver.

I would imagine the wonderful life I would have: being a pig driving a giant pickle truck across the country, chasing and finding goldbug. I then moved on to wanting to be a Lego Master. Then an architect. Then a surgeon.

Renner gives a great example of how to use humor to your advantage in college essays. You don’t want to come off as too self-deprecating or sarcastic, but telling a lightheartedly humorous story about your younger self that also showcases how you’ve grown and changed over time can set the right tone for your entire essay.

Technique #2: intentional, eye-catching structure. The second technique is the way Renner uses a unique structure to bolster the tone and themes of their essay . The structure of your essay can have a major impact on how your ideas come across…so it’s important to give it just as much thought as the content of your essay!

For instance, Renner does a great job of using one-line paragraphs to create dramatic emphasis and to make clear transitions from one phase of the story to the next:

Suddenly the destination of my pickle car was clear.

Not only does the one-liner above signal that Renner is moving into a new phase of the narrative (their nanoparticle research experiences), it also tells the reader that this is a big moment in Renner’s story. It’s clear that Renner made a major discovery that changed the course of their goal pursuit and dream-chasing. Through structure, Renner conveys excitement and entices the reader to keep pushing forward to the next part of the story.

Technique #3: playing with syntax. The third technique is to use sentences of varying length, syntax, and structure. Most of the essay's written in standard English and uses grammatically correct sentences. However, at key moments, Renner emphasizes that the reader needs to sit up and pay attention by switching to short, colloquial, differently punctuated, and sometimes fragmented sentences.

Even with moving frequently between hotels, AirBnB's, and students' apartments, I strangely reveled in the freedom I had to enjoy my surroundings and form new friendships with graduate school students from the lab. We explored The Inner Harbor at night, attended a concert together one weekend, and even got to watch the Orioles lose (to nobody's surprise). Ironically, it's through these new friendships I discovered something unexpected: what I truly love is sharing research.

In the examples above, Renner switches adeptly between long, flowing sentences and quippy, telegraphic ones. At the same time, Renner uses these different sentence lengths intentionally. As they describe their experiences in new places, they use longer sentences to immerse the reader in the sights, smells, and sounds of those experiences. And when it’s time to get a big, key idea across, Renner switches to a short, punchy sentence to stop the reader in their tracks.

The varying syntax and sentence lengths pull the reader into the narrative and set up crucial “aha” moments when it’s most important…which is a surefire way to make any college essay stand out.

Renner's essay is very strong, but there are still a few little things that could be improved.

Connecting the research experiences to the theme of “finding the goldbug.”  The essay begins and ends with Renner’s connection to the idea of “finding the goldbug.” And while this metaphor is deftly tied into the essay’s intro and conclusion, it isn’t entirely clear what Renner’s big findings were during the research experiences that are described in the middle of the essay. It would be great to add a sentence or two stating what Renner’s big takeaways (or “goldbugs”) were from these experiences, which add more cohesion to the essay as a whole.

Give more details about discovering the world of nanomedicine. It makes sense that Renner wants to get into the details of their big research experiences as quickly as possible. After all, these are the details that show Renner’s dedication to nanomedicine! But a smoother transition from the opening pickle car/goldbug story to Renner’s “real goldbug” of nanoparticles would help the reader understand why nanoparticles became Renner’s goldbug. Finding out why Renner is so motivated to study nanomedicine–and perhaps what put them on to this field of study–would help readers fully understand why Renner chose this path in the first place.

4 Essential Tips for Writing Your Own Essay

How can you use this discussion to better your own college essay? Here are some suggestions for ways to use this resource effectively.

#1: Get Help From the Experts

Getting your college applications together takes a lot of work and can be pretty intimidatin g. Essays are even more important than ever now that admissions processes are changing and schools are going test-optional and removing diversity standards thanks to new Supreme Court rulings .  If you want certified expert help that really makes a difference, get started with  PrepScholar’s Essay Editing and Coaching program. Our program can help you put together an incredible essay from idea to completion so that your application stands out from the crowd. We've helped students get into the best colleges in the United States, including Harvard, Stanford, and Yale.  If you're ready to take the next step and boost your odds of getting into your dream school, connect with our experts today .

#2: Read Other Essays to Get Ideas for Your Own

As you go through the essays we've compiled for you above, ask yourself the following questions:

• Can you explain to yourself (or someone else!) why the opening sentence works well?
• Look for the essay's detailed personal anecdote. What senses is the author describing? Can you easily picture the scene in your mind's eye?
• Find the place where this anecdote bridges into a larger insight about the author. How does the essay connect the two? How does the anecdote work as an example of the author's characteristic, trait, or skill?
• Check out the essay's tone. If it's funny, can you find the places where the humor comes from? If it's sad and moving, can you find the imagery and description of feelings that make you moved? If it's serious, can you see how word choice adds to this tone?

Make a note whenever you find an essay or part of an essay that you think was particularly well-written, and think about what you like about it . Is it funny? Does it help you really get to know the writer? Does it show what makes the writer unique? Once you have your list, keep it next to you while writing your essay to remind yourself to try and use those same techniques in your own essay.

#3: Find Your "A-Ha!" Moment

All of these essays rely on connecting with the reader through a heartfelt, highly descriptive scene from the author's life. It can either be very dramatic (did you survive a plane crash?) or it can be completely mundane (did you finally beat your dad at Scrabble?). Either way, it should be personal and revealing about you, your personality, and the way you are now that you are entering the adult world.

Check out essays by authors like John Jeremiah Sullivan , Leslie Jamison , Hanif Abdurraqib , and Esmé Weijun Wang to get more examples of how to craft a compelling personal narrative.

#4: Start Early, Revise Often

Let me level with you: the best writing isn't writing at all. It's rewriting. And in order to have time to rewrite, you have to start way before the application deadline. My advice is to write your first draft at least two months before your applications are due.

Let it sit for a few days untouched. Then come back to it with fresh eyes and think critically about what you've written. What's extra? What's missing? What is in the wrong place? What doesn't make sense? Don't be afraid to take it apart and rearrange sections. Do this several times over, and your essay will be much better for it!

For more editing tips, check out a style guide like Dreyer's English or Eats, Shoots & Leaves .

What's Next?

Still not sure which colleges you want to apply to? Our experts will show you how to make a college list that will help you choose a college that's right for you.

Interested in learning more about college essays? Check out our detailed breakdown of exactly how personal statements work in an application , some suggestions on what to avoid when writing your essay , and our guide to writing about your extracurricular activities .

Working on the rest of your application? Read what admissions officers wish applicants knew before applying .

The recommendations in this post are based solely on our knowledge and experience. If you purchase an item through one of our links PrepScholar may receive a commission.

Anna scored in the 99th percentile on her SATs in high school, and went on to major in English at Princeton and to get her doctorate in English Literature at Columbia. She is passionate about improving student access to higher education.

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