essay on importance of life skill

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Eight brilliant student essays on what matters most in life.

Read winning essays from our spring 2019 student writing contest.

For the spring 2019 student writing contest, we invited students to read the YES! article “Three Things That Matter Most in Youth and Old Age” by Nancy Hill. Like the author, students interviewed someone significantly older than them about the three things that matter most in life. Students then wrote about what they learned, and about how their interviewees’ answers compare to their own top priorities.

The Winners

From the hundreds of essays written, these eight were chosen as winners. Be sure to read the author’s response to the essay winners and the literary gems that caught our eye. Plus, we share an essay from teacher Charles Sanderson, who also responded to the writing prompt.

Middle School Winner: Rory Leyva

High School Winner:  Praethong Klomsum

University Winner:  Emily Greenbaum

Powerful Voice Winner: Amanda Schwaben

Powerful Voice Winner: Antonia Mills

Powerful Voice Winner:  Isaac Ziemba

Powerful Voice Winner: Lily Hersch

“Tell It Like It Is” Interview Winner: Jonas Buckner

From the Author: Response to Student Winners

Literary Gems

From A Teacher: Charles Sanderson

From the Author: Response to Charles Sanderson

Middle School Winner

Village Home Education Resource Center, Portland, Ore.

The Lessons Of Mortality 

“As I’ve aged, things that are more personal to me have become somewhat less important. Perhaps I’ve become less self-centered with the awareness of mortality, how short one person’s life is.” This is how my 72-year-old grandma believes her values have changed over the course of her life. Even though I am only 12 years old, I know my life won’t last forever, and someday I, too, will reflect on my past decisions. We were all born to exist and eventually die, so we have evolved to value things in the context of mortality.

One of the ways I feel most alive is when I play roller derby. I started playing for the Rose City Rollers Juniors two years ago, and this year, I made the Rosebud All-Stars travel team. Roller derby is a fast-paced, full-contact sport. The physicality and intense training make me feel in control of and present in my body.

My roller derby team is like a second family to me. Adolescence is complicated. We understand each other in ways no one else can. I love my friends more than I love almost anything else. My family would have been higher on my list a few years ago, but as I’ve aged it has been important to make my own social connections.

Music led me to roller derby.  I started out jam skating at the roller rink. Jam skating is all about feeling the music. It integrates gymnastics, breakdancing, figure skating, and modern dance with R & B and hip hop music. When I was younger, I once lay down in the DJ booth at the roller rink and was lulled to sleep by the drawl of wheels rolling in rhythm and people talking about the things they came there to escape. Sometimes, I go up on the roof of my house at night to listen to music and feel the wind rustle my hair. These unique sensations make me feel safe like nothing else ever has.

My grandma tells me, “Being close with family and friends is the most important thing because I haven’t

always had that.” When my grandma was two years old, her father died. Her mother became depressed and moved around a lot, which made it hard for my grandma to make friends. Once my grandma went to college, she made lots of friends. She met my grandfather, Joaquin Leyva when she was working as a park ranger and he was a surfer. They bought two acres of land on the edge of a redwood forest and had a son and a daughter. My grandma created a stable family that was missing throughout her early life.

My grandma is motivated to maintain good health so she can be there for her family. I can relate because I have to be fit and strong for my team. Since she lost my grandfather to cancer, she realizes how lucky she is to have a functional body and no life-threatening illnesses. My grandma tries to eat well and exercise, but she still struggles with depression. Over time, she has learned that reaching out to others is essential to her emotional wellbeing.  

Caring for the earth is also a priority for my grandma I’ve been lucky to learn from my grandma. She’s taught me how to hunt for fossils in the desert and find shells on the beach. Although my grandma grew up with no access to the wilderness, she admired the green open areas of urban cemeteries. In college, she studied geology and hiked in the High Sierras. For years, she’s been an advocate for conserving wildlife habitat and open spaces.

Our priorities may seem different, but it all comes down to basic human needs. We all desire a purpose, strive to be happy, and need to be loved. Like Nancy Hill says in the YES! Magazine article “Three Things That Matter Most in Youth and Old Age,” it can be hard to decipher what is important in life. I believe that the constant search for satisfaction and meaning is the only thing everyone has in common. We all want to know what matters, and we walk around this confusing world trying to find it. The lessons I’ve learned from my grandma about forging connections, caring for my body, and getting out in the world inspire me to live my life my way before it’s gone.

Rory Leyva is a seventh-grader from Portland, Oregon. Rory skates for the Rosebuds All-Stars roller derby team. She loves listening to music and hanging out with her friends.

High School Winner

Praethong Klomsum

  Santa Monica High School, Santa Monica, Calif.

Time Only Moves Forward

Sandra Hernandez gazed at the tiny house while her mother’s gentle hands caressed her shoulders. It wasn’t much, especially for a family of five. This was 1960, she was 17, and her family had just moved to Culver City.

Flash forward to 2019. Sandra sits in a rocking chair, knitting a blanket for her latest grandchild, in the same living room. Sandra remembers working hard to feed her eight children. She took many different jobs before settling behind the cash register at a Japanese restaurant called Magos. “It was a struggle, and my husband Augustine, was planning to join the military at that time, too.”

In the YES! Magazine article “Three Things That Matter Most in Youth and Old Age,” author Nancy Hill states that one of the most important things is “…connecting with others in general, but in particular with those who have lived long lives.” Sandra feels similarly. It’s been hard for Sandra to keep in contact with her family, which leaves her downhearted some days. “It’s important to maintain that connection you have with your family, not just next-door neighbors you talk to once a month.”

Despite her age, Sandra is a daring woman. Taking risks is important to her, and she’ll try anything—from skydiving to hiking. Sandra has some regrets from the past, but nowadays, she doesn’t wonder about the “would have, could have, should haves.” She just goes for it with a smile.

Sandra thought harder about her last important thing, the blue and green blanket now finished and covering

her lap. “I’ve definitely lived a longer life than most, and maybe this is just wishful thinking, but I hope I can see the day my great-grandchildren are born.” She’s laughing, but her eyes look beyond what’s in front of her. Maybe she is reminiscing about the day she held her son for the first time or thinking of her grandchildren becoming parents. I thank her for her time and she waves it off, offering me a styrofoam cup of lemonade before I head for the bus station.

The bus is sparsely filled. A voice in my head reminds me to finish my 10-page history research paper before spring break. I take a window seat and pull out my phone and earbuds. My playlist is already on shuffle, and I push away thoughts of that dreaded paper. Music has been a constant in my life—from singing my lungs out in kindergarten to Barbie’s “I Need To Know,” to jamming out to Taylor Swift’s “Blank Space” in sixth grade, to BTS’s “Intro: Never Mind” comforting me when I’m at my lowest. Music is my magic shop, a place where I can trade away my fears for calm.

I’ve always been afraid of doing something wrong—not finishing my homework or getting a C when I can do better. When I was 8, I wanted to be like the big kids. As I got older, I realized that I had exchanged my childhood longing for the 48 pack of crayons for bigger problems, balancing grades, a social life, and mental stability—all at once. I’m going to get older whether I like it or not, so there’s no point forcing myself to grow up faster.  I’m learning to live in the moment.

The bus is approaching my apartment, where I know my comfy bed and a home-cooked meal from my mom are waiting. My mom is hard-working, confident, and very stubborn. I admire her strength of character. She always keeps me in line, even through my rebellious phases.

My best friend sends me a text—an update on how broken her laptop is. She is annoying. She says the stupidest things and loves to state the obvious. Despite this, she never fails to make me laugh until my cheeks feel numb. The rest of my friends are like that too—loud, talkative, and always brightening my day. Even friends I stopped talking to have a place in my heart. Recently, I’ve tried to reconnect with some of them. This interview was possible because a close friend from sixth grade offered to introduce me to Sandra, her grandmother.  

I’m decades younger than Sandra, so my view of what’s important isn’t as broad as hers, but we share similar values, with friends and family at the top. I have a feeling that when Sandra was my age, she used to love music, too. Maybe in a few decades, when I’m sitting in my rocking chair, drawing in my sketchbook, I’ll remember this article and think back fondly to the days when life was simple.

Praethong Klomsum is a tenth-grader at Santa Monica High School in Santa Monica, California.  Praethong has a strange affinity for rhyme games and is involved in her school’s dance team. She enjoys drawing and writing, hoping to impact people willing to listen to her thoughts and ideas.

University Winner

Emily Greenbaum

Kent State University, Kent, Ohio 

The Life-Long War

Every morning we open our eyes, ready for a new day. Some immediately turn to their phones and social media. Others work out or do yoga. For a certain person, a deep breath and the morning sun ground him. He hears the clink-clank of his wife cooking low sodium meat for breakfast—doctor’s orders! He sees that the other side of the bed is already made, the dogs are no longer in the room, and his clothes are set out nicely on the loveseat.

Today, though, this man wakes up to something different: faded cream walls and jello. This person, my hero, is Master Chief Petty Officer Roger James.

I pulled up my chair close to Roger’s vinyl recliner so I could hear him above the noise of the beeping dialysis machine. I noticed Roger would occasionally glance at his wife Susan with sparkly eyes when he would recall memories of the war or their grandkids. He looked at Susan like she walked on water.

Roger James served his country for thirty years. Now, he has enlisted in another type of war. He suffers from a rare blood cancer—the result of the wars he fought in. Roger has good and bad days. He says, “The good outweighs the bad, so I have to be grateful for what I have on those good days.”

When Roger retired, he never thought the effects of the war would reach him. The once shallow wrinkles upon his face become deeper, as he tells me, “It’s just cancer. Others are suffering from far worse. I know I’ll make it.”

Like Nancy Hill did in her article “Three Things that Matter Most in Youth and Old Age,” I asked Roger, “What are the three most important things to you?” James answered, “My wife Susan, my grandkids, and church.”

Roger and Susan served together in the Vietnam war. She was a nurse who treated his cuts and scrapes one day. I asked Roger why he chose Susan. He said, “Susan told me to look at her while she cleaned me up. ‘This may sting, but don’t be a baby.’ When I looked into her eyes, I felt like she was looking into my soul, and I didn’t want her to leave. She gave me this sense of home. Every day I wake up, she makes me feel the same way, and I fall in love with her all over again.”

Roger and Susan have two kids and four grandkids, with great-grandchildren on the way. He claims that his grandkids give him the youth that he feels slowly escaping from his body. This adoring grandfather is energized by coaching t-ball and playing evening card games with the grandkids.

The last thing on his list was church. His oldest daughter married a pastor. Together they founded a church. Roger said that the connection between his faith and family is important to him because it gave him a reason to want to live again. I learned from Roger that when you’re across the ocean, you tend to lose sight of why you are fighting. When Roger returned, he didn’t have the will to live. Most days were a struggle, adapting back into a society that lacked empathy for the injuries, pain, and psychological trauma carried by returning soldiers. Church changed that for Roger and gave him a sense of purpose.

When I began this project, my attitude was to just get the assignment done. I never thought I could view Master Chief Petty Officer Roger James as more than a role model, but he definitely changed my mind. It’s as if Roger magically lit a fire inside of me and showed me where one’s true passions should lie. I see our similarities and embrace our differences. We both value family and our own connections to home—his home being church and mine being where I can breathe the easiest.

Master Chief Petty Officer Roger James has shown me how to appreciate what I have around me and that every once in a while, I should step back and stop to smell the roses. As we concluded the interview, amidst squeaky clogs and the stale smell of bleach and bedpans, I looked to Roger, his kind, tired eyes, and weathered skin, with a deeper sense of admiration, knowing that his values still run true, no matter what he faces.

Emily Greenbaum is a senior at Kent State University, graduating with a major in Conflict Management and minor in Geography. Emily hopes to use her major to facilitate better conversations, while she works in the Washington, D.C. area.  

Powerful Voice Winner

Amanda Schwaben

Wise Words From Winnie the Pooh

As I read through Nancy Hill’s article “Three Things That Matter Most in Youth and Old Age,” I was comforted by the similar responses given by both children and older adults. The emphasis participants placed on family, social connections, and love was not only heartwarming but hopeful. While the messages in the article filled me with warmth, I felt a twinge of guilt building within me. As a twenty-one-year-old college student weeks from graduation, I honestly don’t think much about the most important things in life. But if I was asked, I would most likely say family, friendship, and love. As much as I hate to admit it, I often find myself obsessing over achieving a successful career and finding a way to “save the world.”

A few weeks ago, I was at my family home watching the new Winnie the Pooh movie Christopher Robin with my mom and younger sister. Well, I wasn’t really watching. I had my laptop in front of me, and I was aggressively typing up an assignment. Halfway through the movie, I realized I left my laptop charger in my car. I walked outside into the brisk March air. Instinctively, I looked up. The sky was perfectly clear, revealing a beautiful array of stars. When my twin sister and I were in high school, we would always take a moment to look up at the sparkling night sky before we came into the house after soccer practice.

I think that was the last time I stood in my driveway and gazed at the stars. I did not get the laptop charger from

my car; instead, I turned around and went back inside. I shut my laptop and watched the rest of the movie. My twin sister loves Winnie the Pooh. So much so that my parents got her a stuffed animal version of him for Christmas. While I thought he was adorable and a token of my childhood, I did not really understand her obsession. However, it was clear to me after watching the movie. Winnie the Pooh certainly had it figured out. He believed that the simple things in life were the most important: love, friendship, and having fun.

I thought about asking my mom right then what the three most important things were to her, but I decided not to. I just wanted to be in the moment. I didn’t want to be doing homework. It was a beautiful thing to just sit there and be present with my mom and sister.

I did ask her, though, a couple of weeks later. Her response was simple.  All she said was family, health, and happiness. When she told me this, I imagined Winnie the Pooh smiling. I think he would be proud of that answer.

I was not surprised by my mom’s reply. It suited her perfectly. I wonder if we relearn what is most important when we grow older—that the pressure to be successful subsides. Could it be that valuing family, health, and happiness is what ends up saving the world?

Amanda Schwaben is a graduating senior from Kent State University with a major in Applied Conflict Management. Amanda also has minors in Psychology and Interpersonal Communication. She hopes to further her education and focus on how museums not only preserve history but also promote peace.

Antonia Mills

Rachel Carson High School, Brooklyn, N.Y. 

Decoding The Butterfly

For a caterpillar to become a butterfly, it must first digest itself. The caterpillar, overwhelmed by accumulating tissue, splits its skin open to form its protective shell, the chrysalis, and later becomes the pretty butterfly we all know and love. There are approximately 20,000 species of butterflies, and just as every species is different, so is the life of every butterfly. No matter how long and hard a caterpillar has strived to become the colorful and vibrant butterfly that we marvel at on a warm spring day, it does not live a long life. A butterfly can live for a year, six months, two weeks, and even as little as twenty-four hours.

I have often wondered if butterflies live long enough to be blissful of blue skies. Do they take time to feast upon the sweet nectar they crave, midst their hustling life of pollinating pretty flowers? Do they ever take a lull in their itineraries, or are they always rushing towards completing their four-stage metamorphosis? Has anyone asked the butterfly, “Who are you?” instead of “What are you”? Or, How did you get here, on my windowsill?  How did you become ‘you’?

Humans are similar to butterflies. As a caterpillar

Suzanna Ruby/Getty Images

becomes a butterfly, a baby becomes an elder. As a butterfly soars through summer skies, an elder watches summer skies turn into cold winter nights and back toward summer skies yet again.  And as a butterfly flits slowly by the porch light, a passerby makes assumptions about the wrinkled, slow-moving elder, who is sturdier than he appears. These creatures are not seen for who they are—who they were—because people have “better things to do” or they are too busy to ask, “How are you”?

Our world can be a lonely place. Pressured by expectations, haunted by dreams, overpowered by weakness, and drowned out by lofty goals, we tend to forget ourselves—and others. Rather than hang onto the strands of our diminishing sanity, we might benefit from listening to our elders. Many elders have experienced setbacks in their young lives. Overcoming hardship and surviving to old age is wisdom that they carry.  We can learn from them—and can even make their day by taking the time to hear their stories.  

Nancy Hill, who wrote the YES! Magazine article “Three Things That Matter Most in Youth and Old Age,” was right: “We live among such remarkable people, yet few know their stories.” I know a lot about my grandmother’s life, and it isn’t as serene as my own. My grandmother, Liza, who cooks every day, bakes bread on holidays for our neighbors, brings gifts to her doctor out of the kindness of her heart, and makes conversation with neighbors even though she is isn’t fluent in English—Russian is her first language—has struggled all her life. Her mother, Anna, a single parent, had tuberculosis, and even though she had an inviolable spirit, she was too frail to care for four children. She passed away when my grandmother was sixteen, so my grandmother and her siblings spent most of their childhood in an orphanage. My grandmother got married at nineteen to my grandfather, Pinhas. He was a man who loved her more than he loved himself and was a godsend to every person he met. Liza was—and still is—always quick to do what was best for others, even if that person treated her poorly. My grandmother has lived with physical pain all her life, yet she pushed herself to climb heights that she wasn’t ready for. Against all odds, she has lived to tell her story to people who are willing to listen. And I always am.

I asked my grandmother, “What are three things most important to you?” Her answer was one that I already expected: One, for everyone to live long healthy lives. Two, for you to graduate from college. Three, for you to always remember that I love you.

What may be basic to you means the world to my grandmother. She just wants what she never had the chance to experience: a healthy life, an education, and the chance to express love to the people she values. The three things that matter most to her may be so simple and ordinary to outsiders, but to her, it is so much more. And who could take that away?

Antonia Mills was born and raised in Brooklyn, New York and attends Rachel Carson High School.  Antonia enjoys creative activities, including writing, painting, reading, and baking. She hopes to pursue culinary arts professionally in the future. One of her favorite quotes is, “When you start seeing your worth, you’ll find it harder to stay around people who don’t.” -Emily S.P.  

  Powerful Voice Winner

   Isaac Ziemba

Odyssey Multiage Program, Bainbridge Island, Wash. 

This Former State Trooper Has His Priorities Straight: Family, Climate Change, and Integrity

I have a personal connection to people who served in the military and first responders. My uncle is a first responder on the island I live on, and my dad retired from the Navy. That was what made a man named Glen Tyrell, a state trooper for 25 years, 2 months and 9 days, my first choice to interview about what three things matter in life. In the YES! Magazine article “The Three Things That Matter Most in Youth and Old Age,” I learned that old and young people have a great deal in common. I know that’s true because Glen and I care about a lot of the same things.

For Glen, family is at the top of his list of important things. “My wife was, and is, always there for me. My daughters mean the world to me, too, but Penny is my partner,” Glen said. I can understand why Glen’s wife is so important to him. She’s family. Family will always be there for you.

Glen loves his family, and so do I with all my heart. My dad especially means the world to me. He is my top supporter and tells me that if I need help, just “say the word.” When we are fishing or crabbing, sometimes I

think, what if these times were erased from my memory? I wouldn’t be able to describe the horrible feeling that would rush through my mind, and I’m sure that Glen would feel the same about his wife.

My uncle once told me that the world is always going to change over time. It’s what the world has turned out to be that worries me. Both Glen and I are extremely concerned about climate change and the effect that rising temperatures have on animals and their habitats. We’re driving them to extinction. Some people might say, “So what? Animals don’t pay taxes or do any of the things we do.” What we are doing to them is like the Black Death times 100.

Glen is also frustrated by how much plastic we use and where it ends up. He would be shocked that an explorer recently dived to the deepest part of the Pacific Ocean—seven miles!— and discovered a plastic bag and candy wrappers. Glen told me that, unfortunately, his generation did the damage and my generation is here to fix it. We need to take better care of Earth because if we don’t, we, as a species, will have failed.

Both Glen and I care deeply for our families and the earth, but for our third important value, I chose education and Glen chose integrity. My education is super important to me because without it, I would be a blank slate. I wouldn’t know how to figure out problems. I wouldn’t be able to tell right from wrong. I wouldn’t understand the Bill of Rights. I would be stuck. Everyone should be able to go to school, no matter where they’re from or who they are.  It makes me angry and sad to think that some people, especially girls, get shot because they are trying to go to school. I understand how lucky I am.

Integrity is sacred to Glen—I could tell by the serious tone of Glen’s voice when he told me that integrity was the code he lived by as a former state trooper. He knew that he had the power to change a person’s life, and he was committed to not abusing that power.  When Glen put someone under arrest—and my uncle says the same—his judgment and integrity were paramount. “Either you’re right or you’re wrong.” You can’t judge a person by what you think, you can only judge a person from what you know.”

I learned many things about Glen and what’s important in life, but there is one thing that stands out—something Glen always does and does well. Glen helps people. He did it as a state trooper, and he does it in our school, where he works on construction projects. Glen told me that he believes that our most powerful tools are writing and listening to others. I think those tools are important, too, but I also believe there are other tools to help solve many of our problems and create a better future: to be compassionate, to create caring relationships, and to help others. Just like Glen Tyrell does each and every day.

Isaac Ziemba is in seventh grade at the Odyssey Multiage Program on a small island called Bainbridge near Seattle, Washington. Isaac’s favorite subject in school is history because he has always been interested in how the past affects the future. In his spare time, you can find Isaac hunting for crab with his Dad, looking for artifacts around his house with his metal detector, and having fun with his younger cousin, Conner.     

Lily Hersch

 The Crest Academy, Salida, Colo.

The Phone Call

Dear Grandpa,

In my short span of life—12 years so far—you’ve taught me a lot of important life lessons that I’ll always have with me. Some of the values I talk about in this writing I’ve learned from you.

Dedicated to my Gramps.

In the YES! Magazine article “Three Things That Matter Most in Youth and Old Age,” author and photographer Nancy Hill asked people to name the three things that mattered most to them. After reading the essay prompt for the article, I immediately knew who I wanted to interview: my grandpa Gil.      

My grandpa was born on January 25, 1942. He lived in a minuscule tenement in The Bronx with his mother,

father, and brother. His father wasn’t around much, and, when he was, he was reticent and would snap occasionally, revealing his constrained mental pain. My grandpa says this happened because my great grandfather did not have a father figure in his life. His mother was a classy, sharp lady who was the head secretary at a local police district station. My grandpa and his brother Larry did not care for each other. Gramps said he was very close to his mother, and Larry wasn’t. Perhaps Larry was envious for what he didn’t have.

Decades after little to no communication with his brother, my grandpa decided to spontaneously visit him in Florida, where he resided with his wife. Larry was taken aback at the sudden reappearance of his brother and told him to leave. Since then, the two brothers have not been in contact. My grandpa doesn’t even know if Larry is alive.         

My grandpa is now a retired lawyer, married to my wonderful grandma, and living in a pretty house with an ugly dog named BoBo.

So, what’s important to you, Gramps?

He paused a second, then replied, “Family, kindness, and empathy.”

“Family, because it’s my family. It’s important to stay connected with your family. My brother, father, and I never connected in the way I wished, and sometimes I contemplated what could’ve happened.  But you can’t change the past. So, that’s why family’s important to me.”

Family will always be on my “Top Three Most Important Things” list, too. I can’t imagine not having my older brother, Zeke, or my grandma in my life. I wonder how other kids feel about their families? How do kids trapped and separated from their families at the U.S.-Mexico border feel?  What about orphans? Too many questions, too few answers.

“Kindness, because growing up and not seeing a lot of kindness made me realize how important it is to have that in the world. Kindness makes the world go round.”

What is kindness? Helping my brother, Eli, who has Down syndrome, get ready in the morning? Telling people what they need to hear, rather than what they want to hear? Maybe, for now, I’ll put wisdom, not kindness, on my list.

“Empathy, because of all the killings and shootings [in this country.] We also need to care for people—people who are not living in as good circumstances as I have. Donald Trump and other people I’ve met have no empathy. Empathy is very important.”

Empathy is something I’ve felt my whole life. It’ll always be important to me like it is important to my grandpa. My grandpa shows his empathy when he works with disabled children. Once he took a disabled child to a Christina Aguilera concert because that child was too young to go by himself. The moments I feel the most empathy are when Eli gets those looks from people. Seeing Eli wonder why people stare at him like he’s a freak makes me sad, and annoyed that they have the audacity to stare.

After this 2 minute and 36-second phone call, my grandpa has helped me define what’s most important to me at this time in my life: family, wisdom, and empathy. Although these things are important now, I realize they can change and most likely will.

When I’m an old woman, I envision myself scrambling through a stack of storage boxes and finding this paper. Perhaps after reading words from my 12-year-old self, I’ll ask myself “What’s important to me?”

Lily Hersch is a sixth-grader at Crest Academy in Salida, Colorado. Lily is an avid indoorsman, finding joy in competitive spelling, art, and of course, writing. She does not like Swiss cheese.

  “Tell It Like It Is” Interview Winner

Jonas Buckner

KIPP: Gaston College Preparatory, Gaston, N.C.

Lessons My Nana Taught Me

I walked into the house. In the other room, I heard my cousin screaming at his game. There were a lot of Pioneer Woman dishes everywhere. The room had the television on max volume. The fan in the other room was on. I didn’t know it yet, but I was about to learn something powerful.

I was in my Nana’s house, and when I walked in, she said, “Hey Monkey Butt.”

I said, “Hey Nana.”

Before the interview, I was talking to her about what I was gonna interview her on. Also, I had asked her why I might have wanted to interview her, and she responded with, “Because you love me, and I love you too.”

Now, it was time to start the interview. The first

question I asked was the main and most important question ever: “What three things matter most to you and you only?”

She thought of it very thoughtfully and responded with, “My grandchildren, my children, and my health.”

Then, I said, “OK, can you please tell me more about your health?”

She responded with, “My health is bad right now. I have heart problems, blood sugar, and that’s about it.” When she said it, she looked at me and smiled because she loved me and was happy I chose her to interview.

I replied with, “K um, why is it important to you?”

She smiled and said, “Why is it…Why is my health important? Well, because I want to live a long time and see my grandchildren grow up.”

I was scared when she said that, but she still smiled. I was so happy, and then I said, “Has your health always been important to you.”

She responded with “Nah.”

Then, I asked, “Do you happen to have a story to help me understand your reasoning?”

She said, “No, not really.”

Now we were getting into the next set of questions. I said, “Remember how you said that your grandchildren matter to you? Can you please tell me why they matter to you?”

Then, she responded with, “So I can spend time with them, play with them, and everything.”

Next, I asked the same question I did before: “Have you always loved your grandchildren?” 

She responded with, “Yes, they have always been important to me.”

Then, the next two questions I asked she had no response to at all. She was very happy until I asked, “Why do your children matter most to you?”

She had a frown on and responded, “My daughter Tammy died a long time ago.”

Then, at this point, the other questions were answered the same as the other ones. When I left to go home I was thinking about how her answers were similar to mine. She said health, and I care about my health a lot, and I didn’t say, but I wanted to. She also didn’t have answers for the last two questions on each thing, and I was like that too.

The lesson I learned was that no matter what, always keep pushing because even though my aunt or my Nana’s daughter died, she kept on pushing and loving everyone. I also learned that everything should matter to us. Once again, I chose to interview my Nana because she matters to me, and I know when she was younger she had a lot of things happen to her, so I wanted to know what she would say. The point I’m trying to make is that be grateful for what you have and what you have done in life.

Jonas Buckner is a sixth-grader at KIPP: Gaston College Preparatory in Gaston, North Carolina. Jonas’ favorite activities are drawing, writing, math, piano, and playing AltSpace VR. He found his passion for writing in fourth grade when he wrote a quick autobiography. Jonas hopes to become a horror writer someday.

From The Author: Responses to Student Winners

Dear Emily, Isaac, Antonia, Rory, Praethong, Amanda, Lily, and Jonas,

Your thought-provoking essays sent my head spinning. The more I read, the more impressed I was with the depth of thought, beauty of expression, and originality. It left me wondering just how to capture all of my reactions in a single letter. After multiple false starts, I’ve landed on this: I will stick to the theme of three most important things.

The three things I found most inspirational about your essays:

You listened.

You connected.

We live in troubled times. Tensions mount between countries, cultures, genders, religious beliefs, and generations. If we fail to find a way to understand each other, to see similarities between us, the future will be fraught with increased hostility.

You all took critical steps toward connecting with someone who might not value the same things you do by asking a person who is generations older than you what matters to them. Then, you listened to their answers. You saw connections between what is important to them and what is important to you. Many of you noted similarities, others wondered if your own list of the three most important things would change as you go through life. You all saw the validity of the responses you received and looked for reasons why your interviewees have come to value what they have.

It is through these things—asking, listening, and connecting—that we can begin to bridge the differences in experiences and beliefs that are currently dividing us.

Individual observations

Each one of you made observations that all of us, regardless of age or experience, would do well to keep in mind. I chose one quote from each person and trust those reading your essays will discover more valuable insights.

“Our priorities may seem different, but they come back to basic human needs. We all desire a purpose, strive to be happy, and work to make a positive impact.” 

“You can’t judge a person by what you think , you can only judge a person by what you know .”

Emily (referencing your interviewee, who is battling cancer):

“Master Chief Petty Officer James has shown me how to appreciate what I have around me.”

Lily (quoting your grandfather):

“Kindness makes the world go round.”

“Everything should matter to us.”

Praethong (quoting your interviewee, Sandra, on the importance of family):

“It’s important to always maintain that connection you have with each other, your family, not just next-door neighbors you talk to once a month.”

“I wonder if maybe we relearn what is most important when we grow older. That the pressure to be successful subsides and that valuing family, health, and happiness is what ends up saving the world.”

“Listen to what others have to say. Listen to the people who have already experienced hardship. You will learn from them and you can even make their day by giving them a chance to voice their thoughts.”

I end this letter to you with the hope that you never stop asking others what is most important to them and that you to continue to take time to reflect on what matters most to you…and why. May you never stop asking, listening, and connecting with others, especially those who may seem to be unlike you. Keep writing, and keep sharing your thoughts and observations with others, for your ideas are awe-inspiring.

I also want to thank the more than 1,000 students who submitted essays. Together, by sharing what’s important to us with others, especially those who may believe or act differently, we can fill the world with joy, peace, beauty, and love.

We received many outstanding essays for the Winter 2019 Student Writing Competition. Though not every participant can win the contest, we’d like to share some excerpts that caught our eye:

Whether it is a painting on a milky canvas with watercolors or pasting photos onto a scrapbook with her granddaughters, it is always a piece of artwork to her. She values the things in life that keep her in the moment, while still exploring things she may not have initially thought would bring her joy.

—Ondine Grant-Krasno, Immaculate Heart Middle School, Los Angeles, Calif.

“Ganas”… It means “desire” in Spanish. My ganas is fueled by my family’s belief in me. I cannot and will not fail them. 

—Adan Rios, Lane Community College, Eugene, Ore.

I hope when I grow up I can have the love for my kids like my grandma has for her kids. She makes being a mother even more of a beautiful thing than it already is.

—Ashley Shaw, Columbus City Prep School for Girls, Grove City, Ohio

You become a collage of little pieces of your friends and family. They also encourage you to be the best you can be. They lift you up onto the seat of your bike, they give you the first push, and they don’t hesitate to remind you that everything will be alright when you fall off and scrape your knee.

— Cecilia Stanton, Bellafonte Area Middle School, Bellafonte, Pa.

Without good friends, I wouldn’t know what I would do to endure the brutal machine of public education.

—Kenneth Jenkins, Garrison Middle School, Walla Walla, Wash.

My dog, as ridiculous as it may seem, is a beautiful example of what we all should aspire to be. We should live in the moment, not stress, and make it our goal to lift someone’s spirits, even just a little.

—Kate Garland, Immaculate Heart Middle School, Los Angeles, Calif. 

I strongly hope that every child can spare more time to accompany their elderly parents when they are struggling, and moving forward, and give them more care and patience. so as to truly achieve the goal of “you accompany me to grow up, and I will accompany you to grow old.”

—Taiyi Li, Lane Community College, Eugene, Ore.

I have three cats, and they are my brothers and sisters. We share a special bond that I think would not be possible if they were human. Since they do not speak English, we have to find other ways to connect, and I think that those other ways can be more powerful than language.

—Maya Dombroskie, Delta Program Middle School, Boulsburg, Pa.

We are made to love and be loved. To have joy and be relational. As a member of the loneliest generation in possibly all of history, I feel keenly aware of the need for relationships and authentic connection. That is why I decided to talk to my grandmother.

—Luke Steinkamp, Kent State University, Kent, Ohio

After interviewing my grandma and writing my paper, I realized that as we grow older, the things that are important to us don’t change, what changes is why those things are important to us.

—Emily Giffer, Our Lady Star of the Sea, Grosse Pointe Woods, Mich.

The media works to marginalize elders, often isolating them and their stories, and the wealth of knowledge that comes with their additional years of lived experiences. It also undermines the depth of children’s curiosity and capacity to learn and understand. When the worlds of elders and children collide, a classroom opens.

—Cristina Reitano, City College of San Francisco, San Francisco, Calif.

My values, although similar to my dad, only looked the same in the sense that a shadow is similar to the object it was cast on.

—Timofey Lisenskiy, Santa Monica High School, Santa Monica, Calif.

I can release my anger through writing without having to take it out on someone. I can escape and be a different person; it feels good not to be myself for a while. I can make up my own characters, so I can be someone different every day, and I think that’s pretty cool.

—Jasua Carillo, Wellness, Business, and Sports School, Woodburn, Ore. 

Notice how all the important things in his life are people: the people who he loves and who love him back. This is because “people are more important than things like money or possessions, and families are treasures,” says grandpa Pat. And I couldn’t agree more.

—Brody Hartley, Garrison Middle School, Walla Walla, Wash.  

Curiosity for other people’s stories could be what is needed to save the world.

—Noah Smith, Kent State University, Kent, Ohio

Peace to me is a calm lake without a ripple in sight. It’s a starry night with a gentle breeze that pillows upon your face. It’s the absence of arguments, fighting, or war. It’s when egos stop working against each other and finally begin working with each other. Peace is free from fear, anxiety, and depression. To me, peace is an important ingredient in the recipe of life.

—JP Bogan, Lane Community College, Eugene, Ore.

From A Teacher

Charles Sanderson

Wellness, Business and Sports School, Woodburn, Ore. 

The Birthday Gift

I’ve known Jodelle for years, watching her grow from a quiet and timid twelve-year-old to a young woman who just returned from India, where she played Kabaddi, a kind of rugby meets Red Rover.

One of my core beliefs as an educator is to show up for the things that matter to kids, so I go to their games, watch their plays, and eat the strawberry jam they make for the county fair. On this occasion, I met Jodelle at a robotics competition to watch her little sister Abby compete. Think Nerd Paradise: more hats made from traffic cones than Golden State Warrior ball caps, more unicorn capes than Nike swooshes, more fanny packs with Legos than clutches with eyeliner.

We started chatting as the crowd chanted and waved six-foot flags for teams like Mystic Biscuits, Shrek, and everyone’s nemesis The Mean Machine. Apparently, when it’s time for lunch at a robotics competition, they don’t mess around. The once-packed gym was left to Jodelle and me, and we kept talking and talking. I eventually asked her about the three things that matter to her most.

She told me about her mom, her sister, and her addiction—to horses. I’ve read enough of her writing to know that horses were her drug of choice and her mom and sister were her support network.

I learned about her desire to become a teacher and how hours at the barn with her horse, Heart, recharge her when she’s exhausted. At one point, our rambling conversation turned to a topic I’ve known far too well—her father.

Later that evening, I received an email from Jodelle, and she had a lot to say. One line really struck me: “In so many movies, I have seen a dad wanting to protect his daughter from the world, but I’ve only understood the scene cognitively. Yesterday, I felt it.”

Long ago, I decided that I would never be a dad. I had seen movies with fathers and daughters, and for me, those movies might as well have been Star Wars, ET, or Alien—worlds filled with creatures I’d never know. However, over the years, I’ve attended Jodelle’s parent-teacher conferences, gone to her graduation, and driven hours to watch her ride Heart at horse shows. Simply, I showed up. I listened. I supported.

Jodelle shared a series of dad poems, as well. I had read the first two poems in their original form when Jodelle was my student. The revised versions revealed new graphic details of her past. The third poem, however, was something entirely different.

She called the poems my early birthday present. When I read the lines “You are my father figure/Who I look up to/Without being looked down on,” I froze for an instant and had to reread the lines. After fifty years of consciously deciding not to be a dad, I was seen as one—and it felt incredible. Jodelle’s poem and recognition were two of the best presents I’ve ever received.

I  know that I was the language arts teacher that Jodelle needed at the time, but her poem revealed things I never knew I taught her: “My father figure/ Who taught me/ That listening is for observing the world/ That listening is for learning/Not obeying/Writing is for connecting/Healing with others.”

Teaching is often a thankless job, one that frequently brings more stress and anxiety than joy and hope. Stress erodes my patience. Anxiety curtails my ability to enter each interaction with every student with the grace they deserve. However, my time with Jodelle reminds me of the importance of leaning in and listening.

In the article “Three Things That Matter Most in Youth and Old Age” by Nancy Hill, she illuminates how we “live among such remarkable people, yet few know their stories.” For the last twenty years, I’ve had the privilege to work with countless of these “remarkable people,” and I’ve done my best to listen, and, in so doing, I hope my students will realize what I’ve known for a long time; their voices matter and deserve to be heard, but the voices of their tias and abuelitos and babushkas are equally important. When we take the time to listen, I believe we do more than affirm the humanity of others; we affirm our own as well.

Charles Sanderson has grounded his nineteen-year teaching career in a philosophy he describes as “Mirror, Window, Bridge.” Charles seeks to ensure all students see themselves, see others, and begin to learn the skills to build bridges of empathy, affinity, and understanding between communities and cultures that may seem vastly different. He proudly teaches at the Wellness, Business and Sports School in Woodburn, Oregon, a school and community that brings him joy and hope on a daily basis.

From   The Author: Response to Charles Sanderson

Dear Charles Sanderson,

Thank you for submitting an essay of your own in addition to encouraging your students to participate in YES! Magazine’s essay contest.

Your essay focused not on what is important to you, but rather on what is important to one of your students. You took what mattered to her to heart, acting upon it by going beyond the school day and creating a connection that has helped fill a huge gap in her life. Your efforts will affect her far beyond her years in school. It is clear that your involvement with this student is far from the only time you have gone beyond the classroom, and while you are not seeking personal acknowledgment, I cannot help but applaud you.

In an ideal world, every teacher, every adult, would show the same interest in our children and adolescents that you do. By taking the time to listen to what is important to our youth, we can help them grow into compassionate, caring adults, capable of making our world a better place.

Your concerted efforts to guide our youth to success not only as students but also as human beings is commendable. May others be inspired by your insights, concerns, and actions. You define excellence in teaching.

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Why are life skills important?

in Blogs & Articles

From the benefits it brings to the individual to the positive effect it has on employability and wider society, learn all about the importance of having life skills. 

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The importance of life skills

In a constantly changing environment, having life skills is an essential part of being able to meet the challenges of everyday life. The dramatic changes in global economies over the past five years have been matched with the transformation in technology and these are all impacting on education, the workplace and our home life. To cope with the increasing pace and change of modern life, students need new life skills such as the ability to deal with stress and frustration. Today’s students will have many new jobs over the course of their lives, with associated pressures and the need for flexibility. 

Benefits for the individual

In everyday life, the development of life skills helps students to: 

• Find new ways of thinking and problem solving
• Recognise the impact of their actions and teaches them to take responsibility for what they do rather than blame others
• Build confidence both in spoken skills and for group collaboration and cooperation
• Analyse options, make decisions and understand why they make certain choices outside the classroom
• Develop a greater sense of self-awareness and appreciation for others

Benefits for employment

While students work hard to get good grades, many still struggle to gain employment. According to research employers are looking not just for academic success but key employability skills including:

• The ability to self-manage, solve problems and understand the business environment 
• Working well as part of a team
• Time and people management  
• Agility and adaptability to different roles and flexible working environments
• The potential to lead by influence

Benefits for society

The more we develop life skills individually, the more these affect and benefit the world in which we live: 

• Recognising cultural awareness and citizenship makes international cooperation easier
• Respecting diversity allows creativity and imagination to flourish developing a more tolerant society 
• Developing negotiation skills, the ability to network and empathise can help to build resolutions rather than resentments

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The Importance of Life Skills-Based Education & Why Schools Should Teach Life Skills

In an ever-growing technology and data driven world, much of the focus in education has understandably taken a shift toward STEM-based (science, technology, engineering, and math) initiatives that will prepare students for the coursework and careers of the future . But life skills—how well equipped students are to make good decisions and solve problems in their academic and professional careers as well as their personal lives—should also play a critical role in a well-rounded and comprehensive education.

What Is Life Skills-Based Education?

Think of life skills as the building blocks or framework that allow students to apply the knowledge they acquire in school to real world problems and situations. Also referred to as “ soft skills ” in a professional context, the ability to think abstractly and approach problems from multiple angles to find practical solutions, and the skill to communicate clearly and effectively are just as important as technical knowledge in a particular field or academic subject.

According to Macmillan Education , “In a constantly changing environment, having life skills is an essential part of being able to meet the challenges of everyday life. The dramatic changes in global economies over the past five years have been matched with the transformation in technology and these are all impacting on education, the workplace, and our home life.”

But life skills go well beyond choosing a major in college or impressing a potential employer in the future. Life skills provide children with important tools for development, such as independent thinking, how to socialize and make new friends, and how to take action in situations where their parents or teachers may not be around to help or intervene ( dealing with a bully or personal insecurities and fears, for example.) Unlike motor skills and basic intelligence, executive function and decision-making skills are not innate but learned .

Examples of life skills include :

• Self reflection
• Critical thinking
• Problem solving
• Interpersonal skills

The Benefits of Teaching Life Skills at a Young Age

Building life skills is essentially an exercise in helping children develop sound judgment and good habits for long-term stability, wellness, and success.

How to Promote Life Skills for Young Students

Parents can take an active role in teaching life-skills at home with projects that provide real world examples and lessons in decision making and problem solving. They can be as simple as assigning household chores and budgeting exercises through an allowance, to caring for a pet or volunteering in the community.

Fun and simple-to-organize activities, like game nights (or afternoons) with family and friends with an educational focus that also encourage working in teams, can help to build social and interpersonal skills.

Everyday Survival Skills

In addition to brushing their own teeth and learning how to tie their shoes and get dressed, young children should know what to do in common situations as well as emergencies , such as:

• How to get to and from home and school
• Who to call in an emergency (memorize phone numbers)
• How to safely cross the street
• What to do if they are bullied or witness bullying
• How to safely use kitchen appliances and prepare basic meals
• How to do the laundry

The Importance of Books and Reading

The benefits of reading to young children and fostering a reading habit early in a child’s life are hard to overstate. From building and strengthening vocabulary and language skills to aiding with creative thinking, reading is one of the easiest and best activities available to teach children a range of new skills. Some of the many benefits of reading include:

• Builds self-regulation (also known as executive function)
• Teaches empathy
• Improves concentration
• Exposes children to diversity and differing perspectives and situations than their own

The acquisition of problem-solving and reasoning abilities is a fluid and ongoing process, and working with children early in their development to lay the framework with examples that they can understand and apply on their own is a good place to start.

If you would like your child’s education to include more life skills, consider enrolling them in a public school at home via online learning . As your child’s Learning Coach you can ensure a well-rounded education that you can supplement with plenty of real world skills!

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What Are Life Skills And How To Improve Them?

During job interviews, potential employers often ask “what are your strengths and weaknesses?”. While this question has the power to…

During job interviews, potential employers often ask “what are your strengths and weaknesses?”. While this question has the power to throw people off, it’s actually trying to gauge whether you’re aware of your abilities and competencies. Many even make the mistake of repeating the skills already highlighted on their resume, while they should be focusing on life skills and how they apply them in everyday life.

Life skills will help you participate in meaningful conversations, practice mindfulness and enhance personal growth. Such qualities are highly valued in a professional setting as they improve an organization’s culture. Wondering what are life skills? Let’s find out!

Meaning Of Life Skills

The need for life skills, the importances of life skills at work, the life skills list – 10 essential skills.

The World Health Organization (WHO) describes life skills as the abilities and positive behaviors that enable individuals to deal effectively with the demands and challenges of everyday life. In a constantly changing environment, i.e., a fast-paced world, life skills have become essential in overcoming the roadblocks of daily life. From managing things better to processing emotions and interacting with others, the need for life skills becomes necessary with time.

There are several underlying features that define life skills, which are

There’s an element of morality as life skills relate to what’s good or bad and right or wrong in society

It affects people on a personal level, especially when it comes to interaction and engagement with friends and family

They’re often controversial as people hold strong opinions about them

The Need For Life Skills

Psychosocial competence, also known as the ability to deal with challenges effectively, is a much-needed skill. Not only does it help you achieve your long-term goals but also improves your mental, physical and social well-being. When you’re able to effectively deal with stress and pressures in life, it minimizes behavior-related health issues. For example, in schools, students falling behind on their coursework can largely benefit from supportive learning environments.

Let’s look at the various ways in which different life skills help us cope with the increasing pace and changes of modern life. Here’s a list of reasons that stress the importance of life skills.

It helps you find creative ways of problem-solving and decision-making

It helps you identify the impact of your actions and take responsibility

It builds confidence in interpersonal communication and makes room for group collaboration and cooperation

It helps you analyze available choices or resources before making important decisions

It helps you develop empathy, a greater sense of self-awareness and appreciation for others

In a nutshell, life skills help you find your voice while you prepare for challenges and opportunities of personal as well as professional life.

The Importance Of Life Skills At Work

In addition to personal development, life skills prepare you for the professional world. You learn how to confidently tackle problems and step outside your comfort zone. You establish healthy work-life boundaries and start paying attention to people around you. Moreover, you continue to learn and grow every step of the way—making room for new skills and knowledge. Let’s look at the importance of life skills in the workplace.

You learn to work collaboratively with other people, which further helps you promote team (or collective) objectives

Not only do you find creative ways to solve problems but you make active efforts to put them into action

You learn to keep an open mind, encouraging new ideas and diverse perspectives

You learn how to stand up for yourself as well as for your team; you’re accountable for your own actions

You discover the ability to recover from setbacks and failures and view them as opportunities to continue learning

If you’re still not convinced about the need for these core skills, here are some life skills examples that’ll highlight their relevance in the workplace:

When you apply for a job, interviewers often want to tap into your skill set that goes beyond your resume. This is your chance to highlight life skills that also act as employability skills such as critical thinking and self-awareness. It even gives you a competitive edge over other applicants.

A majority of people are motivated by the opportunities that a job creates—climbing the corporate ladder. An effective way to seek out more opportunities to develop and practice leadership skills. Whether it’s leading an independent project or a team, you need these essential skills to guide and help you advance in your career.

A highly valuable trait in the workplace is the ability to navigate, manage and resolve conflicts. Any organization with diverse employees also invites diverse perspectives and there will be times when there’s a difference in opinions and viewpoints. Life skills help you look at the bigger picture and consider multiple perspectives. As a result, conflict management becomes easier.

The Life Skills List – 10 Essential Skills

Although life skills are related to personal development and well-being, it’s useful to reflect on our environment and personal relationships. It leads to sociability, tolerance and increased self-esteem . We learn to say no without being aggressive and make compromises for positive solutions.

Here’s a comprehensive life skills list you should consider to make active changes that lead to self-improvement.

Self-Awareness

If you’re able to appreciate and differentiate between your strengths and weaknesses, you’re a self-aware individual. It helps you make choices, take actions and make decisions that are consistent with your abilities. Examples of self-awareness are:

The ability to understand what you can or can’t do

Recognizing your own talents and being aware of your skill set

The ability to differentiate between the weak and strong aspects of your abilities or behavior

Self-Esteem

It refers to the way you feel about yourself and what others think of you. People with healthy self-esteem trust themselves and their abilities. They aren’t afraid of what others think about them. Examples of healthy and positive self-esteem are:

Developing a positive self-image or perception

Respecting yourself and your choices or decisions

Not being influenced by what others think of you

Interpersonal Relationships

Humans are social beings by nature and friendly relationships boost social and mental well-being. Interpersonal skills refer to the ability to positively engage with others and coexist amicably. Interpersonal relationships include a host of interrelated skills, such as:

The ability to spark up conversations in unfamiliar or new settings (e.g., business conferences)

The ability to make others feel comfortable in your presence (e.g., a job interview where you build rapport)

The ability to manage conflict and resolve issues (e.g., respectfully disagreeing with your manager and offering a different solution)

Assertiveness

It isn’t easy to put your foot down, without hurting somebody’s feelings. Assertiveness teaches you how to maintain a delicate balance by helping you express yourself freely without hurting someone’s feelings. In the workplace, it’s especially difficult to establish boundaries and saying no to people. By being assertive , you can communicate your needs and expectations in a respectful manner.

Effective Communication

One of the most crucial life skills, effective communication, includes verbal and non-verbal communication. It goes beyond a simple exchange of words or gestures and involves the ability to express yourself clearly. Examples of effective communication are:

Delivering ideas skillfully and persuading others of those ideas

Using appropriate tone, language and non-verbal cues when presenting information or interacting with someone

Paying attention to your emotions as well as others and making others feel comfortable in your presence

Critical Thinking

It refers to the ability to think critically i.e., separating facts from opinions. This enhances the ways in which we articulate and express our thoughts and ideas. The flexibility and fluency in the thought process make room for creative and innovative thinking. Critical thinking includes multiple abilities such as:

Identifying and planning for risks in advance

Differentiating between opinions and facts

Challenging personal biases and looking at situations from an objective perspective

Decision-Making

The ability to use available information to assess a situation and make an informed choice is known as decision-making . It helps develop problem-solving skills and is a highly valuable trait in the workplace. Examples of decision-making skills are:

Not being influenced by external factors when deciding something

Being certain about your needs, expectations and end goals

Being able to separate your emotions and engaging in rational thinking

Time Management

Time management helps you stay on track, organize your activities and work well under pressure. It further reduces stress and allows you to set goals successfully. To stay organized and on top of your priorities, you must manage your time smartly. Time management skills have several advantages, such as:

Knowing how to spend your time productively and staying organized

Setting priorities and saying no to things that aren’t urgent

Feeling less stressed and having the energy to accomplish things successfully

Negotiation

People often view negotiation as a zero-sum game, while in reality, it involves a win-win situation. The ability to compromise or settle in an argument that benefits everyone is the cornerstone of successful negotiation. It’s an important interpersonal skill that helps resolve conflicts and solves problems.

High emotional intelligence and empathy allow you to accept others who may be very different from you. You show compassion, support and respond to situations appropriately. Empathy improves the quality of social relationships, encouraging trust and respect between you and others.

Being aware of life skills isn’t enough. You need to find ways to actively implement them for successful careers and relationships. Harappa Education’s Leading Self course will help you embark on your journey of discovering your true potential. You’ll learn how to overcome roadblocks and step outside your comfort zone. The Ladder of Learning framework will help you learn everything about competence and skills. You’ll embrace opportunities for growth and learning and pursue the best version of yourself!

Explore Harappa Diaries to learn more about topics related to the LEAD Habit such as  What are Employability Skills , How to Develop  Self-Awareness ,  Why is  Self Motivation  important  and Guide to  Personal SWOT Analysis  to become the best version of yourself.

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Life skills is a term used to define a variety of abilities that allow us to handle day to day issues effectively. Whether it’s learning how to problem solve, making decisions, or mastering the art of communication, life skills can broaden your mindset and help you in both your personal and professional endeavors.

No matter your age, gender, location, or situation, here are 10 core life skills that everyone should learn and master.

Creativity is regarded as one of the most important life skills you can possess. Not only can being creative help you to become better at problem-solving, creativity enables you to see things from a different perspective. Whether it’s in your personal life or at work, creative thinking allows you to think outside the box, come up with fresh ideas and strategies, and helps you deal better with uncertainty. Some other benefits of creativity include that it:

• Allows you to express yourself openly and honestly
• Reduces stress and anxiety
• Gives you a sense of purpose
• Promotes thinking and problem-solving
• Leads to feelings of pride and accomplishment

Problem Solving

Another beneficial life skill to learn and master is problem-solving . Important to organizations and individuals, problem-solving allows us to take control of our environment. Figuring out the root cause of a challenge and fixing it can provide a great deal of satisfaction and accomplishment. Throughout life, there will be many obstacles that you must face and overcome, so learning how to problem solve can help you to:

• Test your aptitude for analyzing information and assessing situations
• Come up with new strategies to overcome a problem
• Boost your self-esteem and ability levels

Communication

Effective communication is a life skill that will carry you far both in your personal and professional life. Throughout your life, you will encounter people from all walks of life, so knowing how to actively engage can help strengthen relationships, improve productivity, and establish trust. Other benefits of communication skills include:

• Creating better workplace relationships
• Helping you stay organized
• Contributing to higher self-esteem
• Helping you build a successful family unit
• Giving you the ability to participate in society

Understanding the power and value of leadership is an important lifelong learning skill that can have a huge impact on other people’s lives. A leader not only takes control, but knows how to motivate, inspire, and empower others. To be a successful leader, you need to see the best in those around you and teach them to believe in their worth. Leadership can benefit every area of your life, helping to:

• Give you greater confidence
• Strengthen communication skills
• Develop character
• Build trust

Leadership skills can be learned through experience and education.

Critical Thinking

Being able to think critically is crucial for future success. Thinking responsibly, productively, and independently can help in every aspect of life. Thinking systematically and clearly helps improve the way that we express our thoughts and ideas. Some of the most important benefits that you can gain from critical thinking include:

• Helping you to make better decisions
• Making you happier
• Improving relationships
• Ensuring your opinions are educated and well-informed

Critical thinking also allows you to see beyond cultural norms and be open-minded to those around you, helping you to learn and understand other factors that can influence other individuals’ decisions.

Self-awareness

Self-awareness refers to your ability to recognize or be aware of your emotions, beliefs, behaviors, and motivations, among other characteristics including your strengths and weaknesses. Self-awareness is a crucial life skill as it gives us a better knowledge of who we are, how we experience ourselves, and what makes us unique and different from other individuals. Once you become self-aware, you will be able to make lifestyle changes that will help you think more positively. Some of the key benefits you can gain from self-awareness include:

• Strengthened communications
• Enriched emotional intelligence
• Greater listening skills and empathy
• Enhanced leadership capacity and capabilities

Time Management

Good time management enables you to achieve more in a shorter time scale, which leads to more free time. When entering the workplace in particular, there will be deadlines that you must adhere to in order to flourish in your role, so knowing how to work well under pressure, being able to focus, and staying organized can reduce stress levels and keep you on track. There are several time management tips which can help, such as:

• Prioritizing wisely
• Taking regular breaks
• Removing non-essential activities
• Planning ahead
• Setting goals correctly

Coping with Stress

In life, it’s inevitable that we will go through stressful moments. Whether it’s waiting to hear back from a job interview, moving home, raising a family, or getting married, stress levels will naturally rise and may hinder your way of thinking. How you cope with stress throughout life can be the difference between overcoming an obstacle and falling at the first hurdle.

There are lots of strategies that you can implement in your daily routine to keep you calm, such as meditation, yoga , and deep breathing exercises. In addition to the tips listed, you should also:

• Take care of your body
• Speak to others
• Recognize when you need support

Alongside stress, how you deal with your emotions is just as important. A death of a loved one, or going through a divorce can stop you in your tracks, so having a good support network around you and being able to openly communicate your thoughts, feelings, and emotions will help reduce stress levels.

Being assertive means you operate from an angle of respect and equality. Assertiveness allows you to respect your own thoughts, rights, beliefs, and values, while respecting the rights and opinions of others. Being assertive can help you to:

• Create honest relationships
• Gain confidence
• Earn respect from others
• Gain more job satisfaction

In addition to being assertive, it’s vital that you have empathy for those around you. Understanding how others are feeling and showing compassion and support can help you respond appropriately. Whether it’s checking in with a loved one, or showing concern for somebody at work, being empathetic allows you to build trust and eliminate conflict with others.

Further Reading from Skills You Need

The Skills You Need Guide to Life

This two-part guide is an easy-to-read summary of the essential skills you need for a healthy mind and body.

The first eBook, Looking After Yourself, covers some of our most popular content and will help you to live a happier, healthier and more productive life.

The second eBook, Living Well, Living Ethically, considers how you can live your best life all the time. It helps you to answer the question: how can I avoid having too many regrets about my life?

A meaningful life is achieved through self-awareness, mental wellbeing, and core skills that can help in each aspect of life.

About the Author

James Daniels is a freelance writer, business enthusiast, bit of a tech buff, and an overall geek. He is also an avid reader, who can while away hours reading and knowing about the latest gadgets and tech, whilst offering views and opinions on these topics.

Continue to: Personal Development What Sort of Leader Are You?

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Importance of Life Skills: Taking Care of Yourself

Prioritize sleep, eating well 101: aim for varied eating, move your body every day, regularly practice self-care activities.

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One of the biggest changes when you go off to college or out on your own is that your parents or caregivers aren’t there to remind you to get to bed at a reasonable hour or to eat some vegetables once in a while. That’s exciting, right? It also means you’re in charge now. Enter: life skills. 

Life skills include the ability to manage your emotions, your mental and physical health, your finances, your relationships, and your school performance. Your ability to champion those things has a direct impact on how you feel about yourself, your emotional balance, your physical health, and your independence. 

It’s a learning curve, and we’ve all been there. Here are some simple yet important life skills to practice every day.

Believe it or not, a good night’s sleep means getting nine to nine and a half hours per night, but we often don’t. Good sleep improves learning, concentration, memory, mood, attitude, energy, digestion, and heart health. It’s kind of a wonder cure. If you’re feeling tired, moody, sick, or just off, adjust your sleep schedule to get more. A few good nights may solve everything!  

If sleep is hard for you, find out what to do when you can’t sleep

Good nutrition is another life skill that promotes emotional and physical health and helps you feel more balanced. Nutrition is something you can teach yourself. It’s not rocket science, but there are also a lot of conflicting messages about how we should or should not eat, which foods are good and which ones are bad, and eating healthy or clean.

What healthy eating actually looks like is eating a lot of different foods so you can meet your nutritional needs without having to think too hard. All foods fit in life, and we eat them for different reasons—to fuel our brains and bodies, to celebrate, to feel comfort, and for nostalgic reasons (like your aunt’s signature mac ’n’ cheese). Eating regularly will help you stay in touch with what actually sounds good to you and enjoy it. 

Exercise boosts your mood and reduces stress by releasing feel-good hormones called endorphins. Getting active —even just taking a walk—is an important life skill to help take your mind off your problems and help you cope. 

Physical activity doesn’t necessarily solve problems, but it’s a life skill that can strengthen your ability to face them. Colleges usually have recreation centers you can use, and they may feature a climbing gym, fitness classes such as Zumba or yoga, and intramural teams or clubs. Ask a friend to join you if you feel nervous about trying something new. 

We all have ways to take mental breaks or blow off steam. Part of adulting is figuring out what makes you feel grounded when you get over-extended. What releases stress for you or gives you the space to regroup? 

It may be journaling with a cup of tea, a morning run, yoga, meditating, a good night’s sleep, or curling up with a good book. Whatever works for you, make a plan to add it to your daily or weekly schedule.

Check out these options for self-care to find what works for you

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3 steps to make it easier to ask for mental health support, how to identify and talk about your feelings, how to combat misinformation and find reputable sources online, search resource center.

If you or someone you know needs to talk to someone right now, text, call, or chat  988 for a free confidential conversation with a trained counselor 24/7. 

You can also contact the Crisis Text Line by texting HOME to 741-741.

If this is a medical emergency or if there is immediate danger of harm, call 911 and explain that you need support for a mental health crisis.

Importance of life skills

The World Health Organization defines life skills as the adaptive behavior that helps a person to deal the challenges, and demands of the daily life effectively. According to UNICEF, life skills is a change in behavior, or development of behavior to seek balance in three areas, as knowledge , skills, and attitude.

Practicing these skills help in developing sociability, tolerance, self-esteem, and competencies in yourself so that you can take the necessary action at the right time. Let us understand more about life skills.

Who needs to learn life skills?

Whether you are a child, or adult, life skills are beneficial for everyone. Every person who wants to excel in their career, and enhance the quality of life should learn these skills. It is different from bookish knowledge.

These are the practical skills that are useful in day to day life. The right time is to start it from the school age. It should be imparted to students along with their education. This way not just the student excels at academic levels, but also makes remarkable growth at personal levels.

It represents “reflective skills” that includes analyzing, and problem-solving skills, “personal skills” that includes interpersonal skills, and self-awareness skills.

What skills comes under life skills?

Life skills cover several areas that impacts the quality of life of a person. There is a close association between life quality, and acquisition of life skills. When a person becomes skillful in all these areas, then his independent functioning, life quality, and social competence also increases.

According to the World Health Organization, life skills are classified into following areas:

• Thinking Skills:
• Self-awareness,
• Problem solving,
• Critical thinking,
• Creative thinking, and
• Decision making

These skills are very important for a person to understand problems, identify solutions for them either or with the assistance of others. Once you arrive at the solution, you need to take the necessary action to effectively address them.

A person learns to develop critical thinking abilities. He thinks in an unusual and different manner about the issues, come up with new solutions, or ideas, and couple it with the ability to evaluate information judiciously and comprehend its significance.

Social Skills:

• Interpersonal relationships
• Effective Communication, and

In this section, a person learns skills to work with other people. He learns the ways to effectively communicate with others either verbally, or in writing or both. It makes a person becomes more aware of himself. He starts to become emphatic and see life from other’s point of view to deal with them in a better way.

Emotional Skills:

These are the skills that helps in dealing with the stress. By learning these skills, you will feel in charge of your emotions. It helps to learn how to practice self-control. These skills teach how to stand up for not just himself, but also for others, and remain calm even when faced with criticism, or provocation. Life skills teach people to take setbacks positively and take it as an opportunity to learn from them and not get disappointed.

How does life skills prove to be advantageous to a person?

These skills help a person live a fulfilling life. It makes a person feel confident and motivated. By learning these skills, you feel more positive, and happy and you radiate the same all around you. These skills can be acquired either by direct experience or through teaching and assisting them to deal with challenging situations in life.

Life skills are important for the overall well-being of the person. It teaches a person how to manage and live better quality of life. An individual learns to live life to fullest by conquering his inhibitions and fears, and realize their ambitions. He becomes better at making decisions in life.

Students when learn these skills, become more self-assured, effective communicators, and independent thinkers. Not just they become good listeners, and speakers but also develop a positive outlook.

Life skills teach you how to overcome your shortcomings that obstructs you from achieving your goals. It could be the fear of talking to the strangers, going to a new place, performing any activity for the first time, or anything else. By learning these skills, you start to accept yourself and live life with happiness.

Also read: Importance of work-life balance

As a part of life skills training, a student sees several motivational videos, and audios that teaches him how to overcome challenges in life. The real-life scenarios make a student feel motivated and more goal oriented. This enables the student to face every challenge in their life with courage. It teaches them to become more self-reliant, and independent.

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Importance of Life Skills Education -10 Essential Life Skills Everyone Should Learn

Life skills are defined as a set of  psychosocial competence  and personal skills that help people make careful big decisions, communicate effectively with others, develop coping skills with surrounding circumstances, and manage oneself which leads to progress and success.  Necessary life skills vary by a person's age and by culture and society. 

Life skills education is an invaluable asset that can help young students overcome the challenges of everyday life, so schools must provide their students with practical lessons in everyday life. Let's take a look at the top 10 essential life skills everyone should learn. 

Importance of Life Skills Education in Preparing for a Better Future

What are life skills, importance of life skills education, 10 essential life skills everyone should learn, 1. self-awareness skills, 2. empathy and sympathy skills, 3. problem-solving skills, 4. decision-making skills, 5. thinking skills, 6. communication skills, 7. interpersonal relationship skills, 8. accepting criticism: a life skill, 9. time management skills, 10. stress management skills, contact form.

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Importance of Life Skills in Education

• Updated on  
• Jan 4, 2024

Importance of Life Skills in Education : What exactly are life skills, and why are they important in education? If you are wondering about this, we have got the answer! Education is intended to improve the quality of life, not just your chances of getting a job. In this blog, we will discuss the essential life skills every person should have and even those recommended by the World Health Organisation. 

Table of Contents

• 1 What are Life Skills? 
• 2.1 Improves Self Awareness and Mental Health
• 2.2 Promotes Effective Decision-Making
• 2.3 Building Healthy Relationships
• 3 What is Life Skill Education?
• 4.1 General skills
• 4.2 Other Important Skills
• 4.3 High-level skills

What are Life Skills? 

Life skills education refers to the fundamental abilities that assist adolescents in developing the skills required to deal with life’s realities. Life skills enable people to learn new things, gain control over their behaviour, and make informed decisions. 

Life skills can be defined in a variety of ways, one of which is as follows: 

To interact with oneself and other people in and around one’s environment and to make a decision that requires high ability, one needs a certain set of social traits and personal qualities. One also needs these qualities to solve different kinds of problems. Additionally, life skills are the abilities needed to approach any situation positively in order to achieve the desired result. Adapting to society, promoting positivity in one’s own behaviour, and adopting a positive outlook on work are all ways to develop life skills.

The World Health Organisation has suggested a list of life skills. They are as follows:

• Self-awareness
• Thinking outside the box
• Thinking critically
• Resolving issues
• Making a decision
• Managing Stress Managing Emotions
• A good interpersonal relationship
• Communication that works

Also Read: Learning Skills For Students & Working Professionals

The list of these skills makes it clear that they are global in scope and include both intrapersonal and interpersonal skills. These skills are frequently divided into three major categories:

• Thinking skills include the capacity to come up with original ideas or to consider various solutions to a problem.
• Social Skills include understanding how to establish solid bonds with people, communicate clearly, and engage in fruitful social interactions.
• Emotional skills include knowing who you are, controlling your emotions, and feeling at ease in your own skin.

Why Teaching Life Skills in School Is Critical?

There are a lot of reasons as to why teaching life skills in school is critical. Some of the reason are mentioned below:-

Improves Self Awareness and Mental Health

Learning life skills help a student understand their true identity, who they are, and what they want from life. It makes them self-aware. They also become aware of the struggles of people around them.

Now that they become self-aware, the are better equipped to handle what they are going through and understand when they need help. This directly has an impact on students’ mental health. It improves quite a bit.

Promotes Effective Decision-Making

Everyday in our lives, we come across situations where effective decision making is essential. Learning life skills helps us in effective decision making. It makes our much more confident and in taking well informed decisions which can potentially be life changing

Building Healthy Relationships

One of the life skills is effective communication. And by learning that, students are able to speak clearly and much more assertively while still maintaining respect for other people’s opinions. What’s more is that the even learn good listening skills and are able to provide appropriate responses to them.

Learning life skills will also teach students to show empathy and give them a clear distinction between listening and hearing.This will help them avoid overreacting, misinterpretation, and miscommunication. Hence, they will be able to build a much more healthy relation with their family and friends along with building healthy workplace connections and even in the society as well.

What is Life Skill Education?

One of these skill types is life skills education. Through this, the kid learns how to live his life to the fullest and how to plan his daily activities in a methodical way. It is a style of education where the child is given the tools to become effective so that he can make decisions based on his intelligence and ability in challenging circumstances.

Must Read: Importance of Soft Skills for Career Growth

Common Life Skills For Everyone

Developing life skills is important, and each life skill has a specific application in life. Life skills include the following:

General skills

• Decision-making abilities: Everyone encounters situations from time to time where they must make choices that could have a significant impact on their lives. A person can learn how to make the right decision and then impart it to others by developing decision-making skills. They can make decisions in any situation that calls for a quick, firm decision.
• Self-awareness skills- Developing the Self-awareness skill allows one to be aware of his or her actions. They will be aware of their own performance and behaviours, allowing them to deal with any situation. A person will discover his or her feelings for things or for other people. It also helps them make sound decisions.
• Communication – You cannot express and make others understand your thoughts without effective communication, which can be achieved by honing your communication skills. It enables them to make their points clearly and convincingly to the audience. It also helps people gain confidence, and having effective communication skills is beneficial in a professional setting.

Other Important Skills

• The skill of having a negative tendency towards wrongdoing.
• Positive behaviour.
• Critical thinking.
• Society’s skills towards each other.

High-level skills

The following skills are covered under High-Level Skills.

• Social support.
• Standard of living in good health.
• Excellent warmth and high mental level.
• Way of thinking.
• Mental and physical relaxation
• Goal Setting and Problem Solving

Life skills instruct us on how to live a happy, positive life and how to manage our time effectively. Life skills are therefore crucial in our daily lives. It sharpens the capacity for situational adaptation and societal success in all spheres.

Related Reads:

1) What are 10 life skills?

Ten life skills are;-

• Critical thinking
• Decision Making
• Inter-personal relationship skills
• Problem solving
• Effective communication skills
• Creative thinking
• Self-awareness building skills
• Coping with stress
• Coping with emotions

2) What are the 4 C’s of life skills?

The 4 Cs of life skills are mentioned below:

• Communications
• Collaboration
• Creative Thinking

3) What are types of life skills?

The different types of life skills are mentioned below:-

 That’s all about Life Skills! If you have any questions related to universities, careers, or courses to study abroad, let Leverage Edu be your helping hand.

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Shagun has 2+ years of experience in SEO, Creative Copy Writing and Social Media content and has written content on ed-tech, finance, lifestyle, architecture and other niches. Professionally trained in journalism, All her works are infused with a passion for writing!!

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Essay on Importance of Communication for Students and Children

500+ words essay on importance of communication:.

Communication is one of the important tools that aid us to connect with people. Either you are a student or a working professional, good communication is something that will connect you far ahead. Proper communication can help you to solve a number of issues and resolve problems. This is the reason that one must know how to communicate well. The skills of communication essential to be developed so that you are able to interact with people. And able to share your thoughts and reach out to them. All this needs the correct guidance and self-analysis as well.

Meaning of Communication

The word communication is basically a process of interaction with the people and their environment . Through such type of interactions, two or more individuals influence the ideas, beliefs, and attitudes of each other.

Such interactions happen through the exchange of information through words, gestures, signs, symbols, and expressions. In organizations, communication is an endless process of giving and receiving information and to build social relationships.

Importance of Communication

Communication is not merely essential but the need of the hour. It allows you to get the trust of the people and at the same time carry better opportunities before you. Some important points are as follows –

Help to Build Relationships 

No matter either you are studying or working, communication can aid you to build a relationship with the people. If you are studying you communicate with classmates and teachers to build a relationship with them. Likewise in offices and organizations too, you make relationships with the staff, your boss and other people around.

Improve the Working Environment 

There are a number of issues which can be handled through the right and effective communication. Even planning needs communication both written as well as verbal. Hence it is essential to be good in them so as to fill in the communication gap.

Foster strong team

Communication helps to build a strong team environment in the office and other places. Any work which requires to be done in a team. It is only possible if the head communicates everything well and in the right direction.

Find the right solutions

Through communication, anyone can find solutions to even serious problems. When we talk, we get ideas from people that aid us to solve the issues. This is where communication comes into play. Powerful communication is the strength of any organization and can help it in many ways.

Earns more respect

If your communication skills are admirable, people will love and give you respect. If there is any problem, you will be the first person to be contacted. Thus it will increase your importance. Hence you can say that communications skills can make a big change to your reputation in society.

Get the huge list of more than 500 Essay Topics and Ideas

Don’t Go Overboard With Your Point

The conversation is about to express your thoughts. And to let the other person know what you feel. It is not mean to prove that your point is correct and the other person is wrong. Don’t Overboard other With Your Point.

Watch Your Words

Before you say something to Watch Your Words. At times, out of anger or anxiousness, we say somethings that we must not say. Whenever you are in a professional meeting or in some formal place, where there is a necessity of communicating about your product or work then it is advised to practice the same beforehand

Communication is the greatest importance. It is important to sharing out one’s thoughts and feelings to live a fuller and happier life. The more we communicate the less we suffer and the better we feel about everything around. However, it is all the more necessary to learn the art of effective communication to put across ones point well.

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How to Develop Interpersonal Intelligence

Level up your social skills with these tips

Sanjana is a health writer and editor. Her work spans various health-related topics, including mental health, fitness, nutrition, and wellness.

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The 8 Different Types of Intelligences

Understanding interpersonal intelligence, developing interpersonal intelligence, benefits of interpersonal intelligence, interpersonal vs. intrapersonal intelligence.

We’ve all been there: saying something super awkward, feeling lost at parties, or having trouble making friends at work. If we’re being honest, these situations can feel really confusing and uncomfortable. It’s not about wanting to be the life of the party or the most popular person in the room, but about really connecting with others. That’s where interpersonal intelligence comes in.

Interpersonal intelligence is about understanding others’ emotions and being able to interact with them successfully, says Tatiana Rivera Cruz , MSW, LCSW, a therapist at ADHDAdvisor.

Fortunately, interpersonal intelligence is a skill we can develop. In this article, we explore what it is, why it’s important, the benefits it offers, and how to develop it.

At a Glance

Want to be more of a people person? There’s a special kind of intelligence for that. Interpersonal intelligence is a specific skill that helps us connect and bond with others.

You can boost your interpersonal intelligence by learning to listen, empathize, and connect with others on a deeper level. With practice, you’ll find yourself making more friends and feeling more confident in social situations.

The concept of interpersonal intelligence was first proposed by Howard Gardner , a developmental psychologist and professor at Harvard University. Dr. Gardner felt that instead of a single type of intelligence, which we try and measure through IQ tests , there are actually eight different types of intelligences :

• Interpersonal intelligence: Connecting with others and forming relationships
• Intrapersonal intelligence: Understanding our own emotions, motivations, and goals
• Naturalist intelligence: Understanding and interacting with the natural world
• Logical-mathematical intelligence: Reasoning, analyzing, problem-solving, and critical thinking
• Spatial intelligence: Visualizing distance, depth, area, and space
• Bodily-kinesthetic intelligence: Having good physical coordination and movement
• Linguistic intelligence: Reading, writing, language, and communication skills
• Musical intelligence: Understanding, creating, and performing music

We’re all born with varying degrees of each of these types of intelligences . However, with effort and practice, we can improve our skills in each of these areas.

These are some of the characteristics of interpersonal intelligence:

• Empathy: Interpersonal intelligence helps us put ourselves in other people's shoes and understand their feelings and motivations. This helps us connect with others on a deeper level.
• Social awareness: Interpersonal intelligence involves a high degree of social skills, helping us initiate conversations easily, build relationships with others, and navigate social situations smoothly.
• Communication skills: Interpersonal intelligence helps us express ourselves clearly and pick up on nonverbal cues like body language and facial expressions .
• Adaptability: Interpersonal intelligence also involves adaptability in various social situations. It helps us adjust our communication style, behavior, and approach to different personalities, cultures, and situations.
• Teamwork: This is a key skill for good teamwork . It helps us work effectively within a group, collaborate with others, and appreciate their contributions. It also makes us more likely to ask for help when we need it.
• Leadership: Interpersonal intelligence is often associated with good leadership abilities. Leaders with this intelligence inspire trust, motivate others, and create a supportive environment that encourages collaboration and growth.
• Conflict resolution: Interpersonal intelligence plays an important role in conflict resolution. It helps us see different sides of an issue, find common ground, and mediate between opposing viewpoints.

It's never too late to develop your interpersonal skills. These are some strategies that can help:

Strike up Conversations

It can be helpful to practice having friendly conversations. You can chat with your neighbor while you get the mail, talk to the person sitting next to you on the train or plane, or make conversation with the person waiting in line with you at the coffee shop.

Find Common Ground

An easy way to bond with someone is to look for common ground with them. When you find things you’re both interested in, you’ll automatically have plenty to talk about.

Show Empathy

Try to put yourself in other peoples’ shoes to see things from their perspective. Practice empathy by acknowledging and validating their feelings, perspectives, and experiences.

Become a Keen Observer

When you talk to people, pay attention to nonverbal cues like their body language, facial expressions, and tone of voice. These can give you valuable insights into how they really feel about something.

Listen Actively

Active listening goes beyond simply hearing someone speak. It involves paying close attention to what they’re saying and showing them you’re interested in their life. Maintain eye contact with them while they talk to you, ask follow-up questions, and avoid interrupting them.

Be Positive

Be positive, approachable, authentic, and respectful in your interactions with others.

Participate in Social Activities

Use social activities and networking events as opportunities to practice your interpersonal skills in real-life settings. Join clubs, volunteer groups, or professional organizations to meet new people and build relationships.

Reflect on Your Interactions

After social interactions, take some time to reflect on how things went. What went well? What could you have done differently?

Learn From Mistakes

Everyone makes mistakes in social situations. Don't beat yourself up, instead, use them as learning opportunities to improve your interpersonal skills.

Study Role Models

Identify role models or mentors who demonstrate effective communication, empathy, and relationship-building skills, and study their behavior.

Try Role-Play

Practice your social skills in a safe space with a trusted friend or family member. You can role-play different scenarios and get feedback on your communication style.

Take a Class

Consider enrolling in a communication class. This can provide you with a structured learning environment and the opportunity to practice your skills with others.

These are some of the benefits of interpersonal intelligence:

• Stronger relationships: By understanding and connecting with others on a deeper level, we can build more meaningful and lasting relationships. This applies to friendships, family bonds, romantic relationships, and even workplace connections .
• Reduced social anxiety: As we develop our interpersonal skills, we start to feel more confident in social situations. We’re able to navigate conversations and interactions more easily, with less social anxiety .
• Increased open-mindedness: Interpersonal intelligence teaches us to be empathic and understanding of others' perspectives, emotions, and needs. This helps us be more inclusive and open-minded .
• More favorable negotiations: Whether we’re negotiating a business deal or mediating between our friends or siblings, interpersonal intelligence is key. We can understand the other person's perspective, build a rapport with them, and find solutions that benefit everyone involved.
• Greater career success: This type of intelligence helps us build professional connections, foster mentorship relationships, and advance in careers that require strong interpersonal skills, such as sales, leadership , negotiation, counseling, and customer service.
• Improved well-being: Strong interpersonal relationships are essential for our emotional well-being. By fostering these connections, we can live happier and more fulfilling lives.

By developing interpersonal intelligence we learn how to understand others’ needs, develop empathy, and strengthen our relationships. At the same time, we learn to see the world from a different perspective.

Let’s take a look at the differences between interpersonal and intrapersonal intelligences.

Focuses on connecting and interacting effectively with others

Emphasizes building relationships and social connections

Includes skills such as empathy, active listening, and communication

Makes us good team players and leaders

Contributes to our social development

Focuses on understanding our own thoughts and feelings

Emphasizes self-discovery, self-reflection, and self-awareness

Includes skills such as emotional regulation and decision making

Makes us independent and self-motivated

Contributes to our personal development

By working on your interpersonal intelligence, you can bridge the gap between awkward small talk and meaningful conversations. With time and practice, you can build deeper bonds and stronger connections in your personal, professional, and social life. You’ve got this!

Harvard Graduate School of Education. Multiple intelligences .

González-Treviño IM, Núñez-Rocha GM, Valencia-Hernández JM, Arrona-Palacios A. Assessment of multiple intelligences in elementary school students in Mexico: An exploratory study . Heliyon . 2020 Apr 14;6(4):e03777. doi:10.1016/j.heliyon.2020.e03777

Al-Qatawneh SS, Alsalhi NR, Eltahir ME, Siddig OA. The representation of multiple intelligences in an intermediate Arabic-language textbook, and teachers' awareness of them in Jordanian schools . Heliyon . 2021 May 17;7(5):e07004. doi:10.1016/j.heliyon.2021.e07004

Lei DY, Cheng JH, Chen CM, Huang KP, James Chou C. Discussion of teaching with multiple intelligences to corporate employees' learning achievement and learning motivation . Front Psychol . 2021 Oct 18;12:770473. doi:10.3389/fpsyg.2021.770473

Okwuduba EN, Nwosu KC, Okigbo EC, Samuel NN, Achugbu C. Impact of intrapersonal and interpersonal emotional intelligence and self-directed learning on academic performance among pre-university science students . Heliyon . 2021 Mar 31;7(3):e06611. doi:10.1016/j.heliyon.2021.e06611

Manchana V. Interpersonal relationships, subjective health, psychological well-being, and quality of life among older adults in South India: Evidence from a population-based study . J Educ Health Promot . 2023 May 31;12:150. doi:10.4103/jehp.jehp_735_22

By Sanjana Gupta Sanjana is a health writer and editor. Her work spans various health-related topics, including mental health, fitness, nutrition, and wellness.

Active Listening: The Role in Communication Essay

Active listening builds trust and strong relationships, active listening can help you to resolve conflict, active listening prevents you from missing important information, active listening enables you to identify or anticipate problems, active listening helps you to build more knowledge, active listening empowers you as a leader, active communication real-life scenario.

In this regard, active listening can be used as a tool to improve the quality of relationships among team members. For example, a leader that is characterized by the ability to pay attention to employees’ concerns is generally perceived as a more reliable person (Hoppe 13). Therefore, an individual can benefit from this skill when meeting new people or improving relationships with current partners and team members.

For example, a leader with strong active listening skills can benefit from this ability by using it to get feedback about a service or product and learn new information from the client’s feedback. This approach emphasizes focusing on another person’s perspective and aiming to understand it better. As a result of reflective thinking, one can specify what exactly should be changed to resolve the conflict and satisfy customers’ needs.

For instance, when a person practices active listening, they make sure to confirm if their understanding of the situation is correct by paraphrasing what was said and asking confirmation questions. In doing so, an individual can often get additional explanations from the speaker, which is helpful in getting a comprehensive view of the problem and grasping different aspects of the information better.

For example, a person with well-developed active listening skills is usually good at critical thinking and analysis. These qualities are crucial when trying to determine or anticipate a problem or risk. As a result of thoughtful reflection and active listening, one can easily notice different details that prove critical to the underlying issue.

In this regard, a relevant example is a leader with developed active listening skills, whose ability helps them collect and use valuable data regarding a particular business project. For instance, by actively listening to different people involved in the project, the leader can discover new information, gain insights, and eventually identify an efficient business strategy.

For example, an individual that is confident in their abilities tends to be more successful in various aspects of their work. Active listening can provide a person with important knowledge and insight, which in turn can inspire them as a leader.

To conclude, active listening is an essential skill focused on understanding the perspective of the person involved in the conversation. This ability does not imply merely hearing what the speaker says and offering feedback. The active listening skill involves listening to the person and making an effort to understand their message by reflecting on their words. In this regard, the listener demonstrates their concern about the situation by focusing on what is happening around them rather than themselves. Such an ability allows individuals to empathize with other people’s emotions, feelings, and behaviors. Furthermore, active listening provides such benefits as trustful and strong relationships, more effective conflict resolution, and improved understanding of the information. This essential skill can be helpful in determining and predicting problems, accumulating knowledge, and being a confident leader. Overall, active listening is crucial in a business setting as well as in other scenarios.

Waiter: Good evening, I will be your waiter tonight. Can I start you off with a drink?

Customer: Yeah, I’ll have some water, please.

Waiter: Still or sparkling?

Customer: Still.

Waiter: Sure, I will be right back with that.

Waiter: Here is your water. Are you ready to order your food?

Customer: Yes, I am. I will get a beef burger. On the burger, I will have no tomatoes and onions, please.

Waiter: Just to make sure I got it right, a beef burger, no tomatoes and onions?

Customer: You got it.

Waiter: Alright, would you like fries or a baked potato with your burger?

Customer: Fries, please.

Waiter: Sure, I will be back with your order in a few minutes.

A few moments later…

Waiter: Okay, here is your burger with no tomatoes and onions and fries. Enjoy your meal.

Waiter: Just to make sure, is everything alright? Would you like anything else?

Customer: Umm, actually, my burger is not so good. The sauce you guys put on here is terribly spicy, and my burger is overcooked.

Waiter: I am so sorry to hear that. You said the sauce was too spicy, and your burger was overcooked?

Customer: Yes, that’s right.

Waiter: I will write that down and let the chief know. We are really sorry that you were not satisfied with your food. Can I offer you a new meal on the house?

Customer: I just want to say I am disappointed that you guys would serve such a bad meal. It has ruined my entire evening. I am not even sure if I want to take you up on your offer for a new meal. Sighs…

Waiter: Again, sir, I am truly sorry, you must feel so frustrated about this incident, so the least we can do is make you a new meal on the house. I know this isn’t an excuse, but the chief is new to the job, and this is the first meal he has messed up, so he will be truly sorry about serving an overcooked meal.

Customer: You said the chief is new?

Waiter: Yes, although like I said it is no excuse.

Customer: You know I apologize I may have overreacted a little, I will take you up on your offer about that new meal as everyone deserves a second chance.

Waiter: Please don’t apologize, you did nothing wrong. Would you like another burger or do you need a couple minutes to choose something else from the menu?

Customer: I’ll just have another burger.

Waiter: Sure. Once again, no onions, tomatoes, or sauce on your burger, is that right?

Customer: That is correct.

A few moments later…

Waiter: Okay, so here is your new burger. Again, apologies for the first meal. I hope you will enjoy this one.

Customer: Like I said, everyone deserves a second chance, and this bite will determine if that is true.

Waiter: We appreciate your decision to give us a second chance.

Waiter: So, how is everything?

Customer: Fantastic, you can tell the chief that this is the best burger I have ever tasted. Thank you very much, it was worth accepting your offer.

Waiter: I am glad to hear that. Enjoy the rest of your meal!

Hoppe, Michael H. Active Listening: Improve Your Ability to Listen and Lead . Center for Creative Leadership, 2018.

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IvyPanda. (2024, April 27). Active Listening: The Role in Communication. https://ivypanda.com/essays/active-listening-the-role-in-communication/

"Active Listening: The Role in Communication." IvyPanda , 27 Apr. 2024, ivypanda.com/essays/active-listening-the-role-in-communication/.

IvyPanda . (2024) 'Active Listening: The Role in Communication'. 27 April.

IvyPanda . 2024. "Active Listening: The Role in Communication." April 27, 2024. https://ivypanda.com/essays/active-listening-the-role-in-communication/.

1. IvyPanda . "Active Listening: The Role in Communication." April 27, 2024. https://ivypanda.com/essays/active-listening-the-role-in-communication/.

Bibliography

IvyPanda . "Active Listening: The Role in Communication." April 27, 2024. https://ivypanda.com/essays/active-listening-the-role-in-communication/.

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The Importance of being Earnest Film Analysis

This essay about Oliver Parker’s adaptation of “The Importance of Being Earnest” analyzes how the film translates Oscar Wilde’s play into a cinematic experience. It discusses the retention of Wilde’s dialogue, innovative visual techniques, impactful performances by the cast, and the rich set and costume designs. The analysis highlights how these elements enhance the story’s themes of identity, societal expectations, and critique of Victorian norms, while also noting the effective use of music and sound to support the film’s theatrical essence.

How it works

“The Importance of Being Earnest,” directed by Oliver Parker, is a vibrant adaptation of Oscar Wilde’s beloved play of the same name. The film captures the essence of Wilde’s acerbic wit and satirical commentary on the Victorian society, bringing to life the play’s intricate humor and timeless themes. This essay delves into the cinematic elements that Parker employed to enhance Wilde’s narrative, exploring how the film’s direction, acting, set design, and thematic portrayal contribute to its success as both a faithful adaptation and a creative reinterpretation.

The film adaptation of “The Importance of Being Earnest” retains much of Wilde’s original dialogue, which preserves the play’s linguistic charm and intellectual playfulness. However, Parker introduces a visual and dynamic fluidity that is absent from the stage version, utilizing the medium of film to explore spaces and scenarios that a theater audience might only imagine. This is evident from the very beginning of the film, where rapid scene changes and playful camera movements establish a lively pace, reflecting the frivolous yet cunning nature of the plot.

Central to the effectiveness of this adaptation are the performances by the ensemble cast, led by Rupert Everett as Algernon Moncrieff and Colin Firth as Jack Worthing. Everett’s portrayal of Algernon is both flamboyant and nuanced, bringing out the character’s sardonic outlook and his zest for life. Firth, on the other hand, effectively captures Jack’s more stoic and earnest demeanor, providing a perfect counterbalance to Everett’s Algernon. Their on-screen chemistry is pivotal in driving the comedic timing and ironic wit that characterizes Wilde’s play. Moreover, Judi Dench as Lady Bracknell is impeccably cast, delivering her lines with the necessary haughtiness and formidable presence, embodying the Victorian aristocracy’s oppressive authority.

From a visual standpoint, the film excels in its set and costume design, which are critical in grounding the story’s absurdities in a visually tangible world. The sumptuous costumes and detailed sets paint a vivid picture of late Victorian luxury and decadence, which is both appealing and critical in highlighting the era’s stringent social codes and the characters’ subsequent rebellions against these norms. The use of bright, saturated colors contrasts sharply with the rigidity and often hypocritical nature of Victorian society, a deliberate choice that seems to critique the era’s hidden extravagances and moral flexibility.

Thematically, Parker’s adaptation does not shy away from the darker elements of Wilde’s critique of society. While maintaining the light, humorous tone, the film subtly introduces themes of identity, social obligations, and the absurdity of the societal facade. The dual lives of Jack and Algernon, who adopt alternate identities to escape societal expectations, serve as a critique of the superficial aspects of social status and romance in Victorian society. The film amplifies these themes through visual cues and editing that emphasize the characters’ duplicity and the eventual unraveling of their deceptions.

Furthermore, Parker employs music and sound to enhance the film’s theatricality and to punctuate its comedic and dramatic moments. The score, which is both whimsical and period-appropriate, complements the film’s light-hearted approach and enriches the setting, making the historical period accessible and engaging to a contemporary audience.

In conclusion, Oliver Parker’s “The Importance of Being Earnest” stands as a testament to the enduring relevance of Oscar Wilde’s work, adeptly translating the play’s textual brilliance into a cinematic format. Through strategic use of filmic techniques, Parker accentuates Wilde’s critique of Victorian hypocrisies, while also celebrating the play’s linguistic dexterity and intricate humor. The film not only entertains but also provides a reflective lens through which modern audiences can examine societal norms and personal integrity. Parker’s adaptation is a compelling blend of respect for the original material and creative cinematic expression, securing its place as a significant contribution to the canon of literary films.

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The Importance Of Being Earnest Film Analysis. (2024, May 01). Retrieved from https://papersowl.com/examples/the-importance-of-being-earnest-film-analysis/

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PapersOwl.com. (2024). The Importance Of Being Earnest Film Analysis . [Online]. Available at: https://papersowl.com/examples/the-importance-of-being-earnest-film-analysis/ [Accessed: 7-May-2024]

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More From Forbes

3 methods to use tech without losing your brand's human touch.

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Keeping your business "human" with technology

In an era of rampant automation, convenience, and AI, you may be tempted to put more weight on tech tools. Just make sure you don't lose your brand's humanity in the process.

People may love the convenience and efficiency of automation, but they're not willing to trade technology for old-fashioned human contact. The human-to-human connection is still a powerful force, especially in business. By offering customers the chance to engage with your brand's team — and not just the AI-based tools or systems you use — you can more easily gain trust and loyalty for your brand.

A recent survey from Cogito showed just how important it is to customers to be able to reach a human representative, even in a digital age. When asked about their customer support preferences, 53% of survey participants said they'd rather talk with a human than a bot. Thirty-two percent agreed that having their concerns resolved by a human would lead to better future interactions with the company.

Is it easier to hide behind tech gadgets and processes? Perhaps. Yet when you do, you deny your organization a key differentiator: The ability to communicate on a human level. Too many companies make it challenging for consumers to engage with humans. This lack of human communication causes friction and encourages those consumers to seek alternatives. Alternatively, if you're offering a more balanced mix of automation and human interaction, you could look very appealing to someone who's tired of automated technology.

This isn't to say that you need to do away with high-tech options. Keep them. But know that they're never going to be a replacement for human intervention. For example, chatbots can be helpful for relatively simple and straightforward issues, but they can be frustrating when problems become more complex. Standalone shopping kiosks can be similarly annoying, which is one of the reasons some brick-and-mortar stores are saying goodbye to self-checkouts .

To help you humanize your business, try incorporating these strategies into your operational workflows. They'll help you stand out positively and deliver more well-rounded value to your customer base.

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1. Strive for an equalized human-to-tech ratio.

As a starting point, consider all the processes that you rely upon to interact with your customers. Then, divide them into those that are tech and those that have a human angle. Ideally, there should be an even split between the two. If you're leaning too heavily into tech territory, consider ways to seamlessly bring team members back into the picture.

Never underestimate the importance of offering consumers a line of connection to honest-to-goodness humans. It matters more than you might think. While on The Big Story podcast in late 2023, Vox business reporter Emily Stewart noted that although many major companies, including Facebook and Frontier Airlines, have ditched human agents, the trend is causing customer stress. "I found someone who could not get in touch with Uber," said Stewart, "And when I asked Uber what she should have done, they kind of said she should use our app. There was no phone number for her to call."

2. Position tech in a "supporting player" role.

Companies have been making technology the star of the show. However, putting all your tech into a supportive role may be wiser. That way, the tech can help you enhance your team's abilities rather than replace them.

For instance, you might want to invest in an AI product that makes it possible for your sales or service representatives to do their jobs faster. A solution that can "listen" to calls and rapidly fetch key information or prompt humans with insider tips could be useful.

The secret to making this work is moving ahead with intentionality. Kelly Knight , president and integrator at EOS, has seen the benefits and reports of intentionally creating people-centric processes. "Relationships always come first. We want to put the human touch in everything we do," she explains. "We realize that people just want human interaction when it matters most. I think that's just going to be the way we continue forever. People are just going to value human relationships more and more."

3. Build your team's interpersonal skills and empathy.

Once you've begun to prioritize your human connections, you may discover that some of your people need coaching in topics like emotional intelligence (EI). Consequently, be prepared to invest in training across your workforce so everyone's interpersonal skills are as refined as possible.

Even if you have seasoned workers on your team, you may be surprised at their lack of EI aptitude. According to Adecco research , 54% of managers admitted that finding team members with solid interpersonal abilities was difficult. About the same number identified listening skills as another "soft" gap in employee toolkits.

By growing your team's empathy, you'll grow your company's humanity. In the process, you should begin to see a nice side advantage: Your people will be able to interact with each other more effectively internally.

It's exciting to explore all the technologies that are emerging today. However, think twice before putting them between you and your customers. The last thing you want is to make it harder for people to love your brand.

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University of Ottawa event calendar from May 6 to 12, 2024

A Church at War WHEN: Tuesday, May 7 from 12 p.m. to 1:15 p.m. WHERE:  Online. The University of Ottawa Press and the Canadian Museum of History invite you to the virtual launch of A Church At War: MacKay Presbyterian Church, New Edinburgh, and the First World War in the company of Ottawa historian Alan Bowker and Canadian War Museum Chief Historian and Director of Research Tim Cook. (In English and French)

Audiology and Speech-Language Pathology 30th anniversary WHEN: Tuesday, May 7 from 4:30 p.m. to 7:30 p.m. WHERE: 200 Lees (LEE) ; in person. Faculty of Health Sciences dean Lucie Thibault invites you to celebrate the 30th anniversary of the Audiology and Speech-Language Pathology program. This event will feature Marie-Josée Taillefer and her daughter, Rosalie Taillefer-Simard, two well-known figures in Canada’s francophone cultural scene, who’ll speak about hearing and communication. (In French)

"Dress Codes: How the Laws of Fashion Made History" by Richard T. Ford WHEN: Wednesday, May 8 from 5 p.m. to 7 p.m. WHERE: Alex Trebek Alumni Hall ; in person. L aw professor and cultural critic Richard Thompson Ford presents an insightful and entertaining history of the laws of fashion from the middle-ages to the present day. Dress Codes explores the importance of day-to-day popular culture for political power, social hierarchy and individual autonomy. (In English)

MedShow 2024 presents musical production Super Med Bros WHEN:  May 9 to 11, from 7 p.m. to 9 p.m. WHERE:  Academic Hall ; in person. MedShow is an annual musical production by first- and second-year medical students of the Faculty of Medicine, with all proceeds going to charity. This year’s production is titled Super Med Bros, a tale of four medical students’ journey in a video game universe, portraying the realities and struggles shared by many medical students while sharing hope and rekindling what inspires them to pursue this career. (In English)

Overview and preliminary results of a Parenting Program to Promote Positive Discipline WHEN:  Thursday, May 9 from 12 p.m. to 1 p.m. WHERE:  Online. A discussion with Elisa Romano , Professor at the University of Ottawa's School of Psychology. Her presentation is entitled "Overview and preliminary results of a Parenting Program to Promote Positive Discipline." (In English)

Telfer Conference on Corporate Finance and Banking WHEN: Friday, May 10 from 8:30 a.m. to 4:15 p.m. WHERE: Desmarais Hall , Room DMS 12102; in person. This conference will have leading finance scholars from Canada, the US and the UK, presenting their high-impact research papers studying important issues in corporate finance and banking, such as corporate social responsibilities, mergers and acquisitions, corporate governance, traditional banks versus Fintech, among others. (In English)

uOttawa Annual Dizziness Symposium WHEN: Friday, May 10 from 7 a.m. to 5 p.m. WHERE: Centurion Conference & Event Center ; in person. Patients presenting with dizziness are challenging, whether this is acute or chronic, in the clinic or the emergency department. Dizzy patients are difficult to diagnose and manage for all clinicians, from primary care to specialists and other allied health professionals. This 1-day symposium will provide participants with a solid foundation of clinical knowledge and skills used to diagnose and treat patients with dizziness through a combination of didactic teaching, case-based learning, and clinical skills workshops. (In English) ACFAS Conference WHEN: May 13 to 17, 2024. WHERE:   University of Ottawa . The University of Ottawa will host the 91st Annual ACFAS Conference, where more than 6,000 participants are expected for the biggest scientific conference of the Francophonie, in which over 300 sessions on various research disciplines will be presented. 

More information:   [email protected]